One of the most prevalent problems of the computer age is isolation and loneliness. In order to build and maintain relationships there are a number of simple skills, which can be learned, to enhance the opportunity to find and keep friends.
All likeable people behave in certain ways. They literally have a "magnetic" personality drawing others to them. The advantages of being likeable are numerous, including higher grades and income, self-esteem, better health, longer life and happiness and well-being. Here are the five tricks you or your child can do today to increase likeability.
1. Be helpful. Studies show that "helpfulness correlates more strongly than any other attribute" with being well liked, says Haara Estroff Marno, author of Why Doesn't Anyone Like Me? Be aware of opportunities to help on a big scale, such as volunteering for projects and assisting others. Give service and teach your child to look for small ways to help others on a daily basis.
2. Liking who you are. When people feel good about themselves, they are more content and less likely to personalize every situation and comment. Develop a skill or hobby that makes you feel good and that brings joy, you don't have to be perfect at it. Just enjoying an activity and doing reasonably well will boost anyone's self-esteem. Make it a habit to end every night on a positive. Either in a journal or verbally list five things you are grateful for or that you have succeeded at in the day. Develop an attitude of gratitude.
Focus on the positive and celebrate and acknowledge your successes.
3. Say hello first. Friendly people put others at ease. Many people are hesitant to say hello because they fear rejection. But think about it, have you ever gotten mad at someone who says hello to you? Even if people don't return the greeting, they may just be pre-occupied. There is an unofficial rule about customer service that can apply to life as well; smile if someone comes within 10 feet of you, greet with a word or nod anyone within 3 feet of you. Smile with your mouth and your eyes. People who smile are perceived as friendly and approachable. A smile says, "I like you. You make me happy. I am glad to see you." To someone who has seen a dozen people frown, scowl or turn their faces away, your smile is like the sun breaking through the clouds.
4. Be aware of the message your appearance says about you. Whether we like it or not, people are judged by they way they look and act. If they look enough like everyone else, they will be more acceptable. If they stick out, they risk not fitting in. Those who develop their own unique style of dress must have the moxie and confidence to carry it off. Then it is an attribute. Your appearance, table manners, tone of voice and respect of space sends an instant message before you have a chance to explain who you are and to build a relationship.
5. Recognize the power of body language. Verbal language is the language of information and is only recognized and remembered 20%. Non-verbal or body language is the language of relationships and is acknowledged and remembered 80%. If your body is not responding according to your message, no one will hear or believe what you say. Practice and role-play so that your facial expressions, posture and hand movements are in accordance with the message you want to share with others.
We like someone because, we love someone although. So give people a number of reasons to like you.
? 2004 Judy H. Wright, Personal Historian, Parent Educator and Author - www.artichokepress.com
This handout has been prepared by Judy H. Wright, Missoula, MT parent educator and author. You may have permission to make copies for other parents and teachers but the entire article, including the signature line, must be included. A complete list of parenting books, aids, workshops and a FREE ezine is available at www.artichokepress.com. To contact us, please write judywright@artichokepress.com or call 406-549-9813.
green cleaning service Park Ridge ..Children are moral and make moral determinations... at least until... Read More
Are you looking for the Ultimate Airplane Themed Party Games... Read More
What parent hasn't gone into a son's or daughter's room... Read More
Dear MomOn this day set aside to honour "Mother's" let... Read More
Boredom, limited space and overflowing energy are a source of... Read More
Best friends! It may seem impossible to believe, but today's... Read More
We are all familiar with the stories that most students... Read More
Being consistent when children are less than perfect can make... Read More
Every summer our daughter goes to summer camp. She looks... Read More
'Whose room is it anyway?'If you have a teenager, you're... Read More
It's no joy to be sick. It's even less joy... Read More
Coping with a child's bad behavior, perhaps more than any... Read More
Many parents would like to homeschool their children but are... Read More
Do you have a consistent problem with your child lying... Read More
There are a LOT of alternative treatments for sale out... Read More
As the new school year begins, parents play a pivotal... Read More
Not many things are more upsetting than discovering that your... Read More
Is your baby approaching his or her first birthday and... Read More
This can be a very complicated issue, so I don't... Read More
There are some grounds to assume that a cognitive dissonance... Read More
The first year of a child's life is the most... Read More
Research has shown that the present generation of children worldwide... Read More
The least flexible character in all of the stories of... Read More
Teens can freely access the Internet from computers at school,... Read More
Ritalin has been shown through the years to be very... Read More
cleaning help near Bannockburn ..O.K. I've heard it a hundred times from my prison... Read More
Let's be honest! When it comes to parenting, men expect... Read More
Self-reliance and potential are two very important values that I'd... Read More
If I had a dollar for every time I persuaded... Read More
Nothing touches the heartstrings of a parent more than the... Read More
In June, elementary school children across North America cheered as... Read More
Is there anything wrong with lying, cheating, stealing, shop-lifting, taking... Read More
On a bright Sunday morning, a couple of weeks ago,... Read More
Back to school preparations are in full-swing. Soon, the first... Read More
Family decision-making is an intriguing phenomenon. Many factors become part... Read More
You can learn a lot from children.The best part of... Read More
If your parenting methods include abuse of any kind; physical,... Read More
Moms, did you ever question your value as a role... Read More
It's the third time this week that Sam has complained... Read More
Most teens go into the work world ill-prepared to manage... Read More
A small town, somewhere in the world, was managed by... Read More
"I don't know and I don't care."I've heard those words... Read More
Last night Tom's daughter, Sue, came out of her room... Read More
Summertime means insect bites and stings. Ouch! Take a leaf... Read More
Time devoted the better part of an issue to it.... Read More
Corolle Paul or Emma Drink-and-Wet SET potty dollsThis is the... Read More
I love Google and Yahoo. With Google and Yahoo I... Read More
Time management is an organisational concept traditionally associated with adults... Read More
Do you have a wild child? Then this article may... Read More
Although many parents are concerned with our children's intelligence quotient... Read More
Parenting |