Do your children have a McChildhood? Do they experience the type of childhood that may satisfy them in the short-term as their immediate needs are met, but in the long-term, leaves them ill-equipped to deal with some of the curve balls that are thrown their way?
The emergence of indoor playgrounds is an example of the lengths we go to not only provide a sanitised life for kids but to ensure that they never get bored (or even get wet and cold when they play)!
It helps sometimes to stand back and take stock of the type of childhood that we provide for our kids.
Here are 10 elements of a childhood that promotes resilience in children and young people.
A resiliency-promoting childhood has the following features:
1. Kids don't always get what they want. The Rolling Stones were right when they sang, "You can't always get what you want, but you can try" all those years ago.
2. They have plenty of opportunities to solve their own problems without adults trying to fix everything for them. Children will only develop their inner resources when given the opportunity to develop their resourcefulness.
3. Children are expected to help at home from a young age without being paid. That is how they learn to be useful.
4. Parental expectations for success are positive, realistic and based on child's interests and aptitudes rather than on adult wishes.
5. Children receive liberal amounts of encouragement but moderate amounts of praise. Praise is like French fries ? kids want them but they don't need them. They need something a little more substantial than quick fix, feel-good praise. They need something substantial like encouragement to help them grow and develop.
6. Children have plenty of free time to do three essential things ? play outside, have fun and to daydream. But they need to have the opportunity to initiate all three, rather than have them initiated by someone. These three essentials help insulate human beings when life gets out of control.
7. Children are involved in family decision-making so that they learn to impact positively on their environment.
8. Children have the opportunity to identify their strengths and then build on these to develop their unique identities through adolescence.
9. Children grow up in families that have their own rituals, rights of passage and celebrations. These rituals provide important anchors to children as they develop and grow away.
10. Resilient children need to be surrounded by resilient adults rather than adults who are continually stressed and have no real life outside from children and work. Begin a hobby is a good place to start if you feel that life is all work (and kids) and no fun.
Michael Grose is The Parent Coach. For seventeen years he has been helping parents deal with the rigours of raising kids and survive!! For information about Michael's Parent Coaching programs or just some fine advice and ideas to help you raise confident kids and resilient teenagers visit http://www.parentingideas.com.au
So you have just returned home from your third meeting... Read More
Checking accounts are an absolute necessity these days. You can... Read More
As the flurry of Back to School activities subside, parents... Read More
This is the third and final article in a series... Read More
Unfortunately each year many young children drown in swimming pools,... Read More
Well first off, please to don't institute the ? hour... Read More
'Whose room is it anyway?'If you have a teenager, you're... Read More
Nail biting in all its various forms is problematic... Read More
Self esteem in an important quality for all children to... Read More
Perhaps I could make a lot of money by founding... Read More
It is hard to believe that summer is coming to... Read More
WHEN AN INJURY HAPPENS AT CAMP, HERE'S WHAT YOU NEED... Read More
Memorabilia ? Children can create enough artwork for an entire... Read More
Q. With the school year just beginning, what can we... Read More
Until the moment I became a mother, I couldn't quite... Read More
Not too long ago my teenage daughter approached me with... Read More
Ever blown your top to your children, only to regret... Read More
Rule #1 Make Every Bite Count!Everything your child eats should... Read More
Child support is defined as that part of your income... Read More
The children of Baby Boomers, the Echo Generation, are entering... Read More
Q: Whenever we tell my daughter "no," she just bugs... Read More
In elementary school it's pretty straightforward: bringing in cupcakes to... Read More
My cousin boasts five names and I confess that when... Read More
Speaking as a Michael (a Hebrew name, meaning "Who is... Read More
What should the goals for counseling be when the patient... Read More
1) It's not my (pot, beer, cigarettes, etc.), I'm just... Read More
If your child is to derive the benefits of physical... Read More
I WAS AMAZEDI could hardly believe what I was hearing.... Read More
Isn't the technology of today is amazing?! Between the speed... Read More
In seminars I am often asked about pocket-money and whether... Read More
Voices have a way of falling into a pattern, not... Read More
Dear Sir, It was with some interest that I read... Read More
When my firstborn arrived into this serene and peaceful household,... Read More
Handing Down Malignancy.Children may begin bright and eager to face... Read More
I am sure that this list can be jogged and... Read More
(Isaiah 11:6 KJV) The wolf also shall dwell with the... Read More
Family meetings provide opportunities for feelings to be aired and... Read More
If you are a parent, then more than likely you... Read More
There are many useful jogger stroller accessories out on the... Read More
A friend phoned her neighbor, complaining about the wafts of... Read More
It is so important to create an environment that promotes... Read More
The human brain never actually stops developing. Beginning formation in... Read More
There are so many learning labels floating around these days... Read More
On a bright Sunday morning, a couple of weeks ago,... Read More
Parents of teenagers frequently ask what can be done to... Read More
Love, love, love. It makes the world go round. It... Read More
What Children Look for in a Friend?Is this child fun... Read More
1. Encourage Questions.Don't answer every question, instead ask what do... Read More
Peaceful Parenting? ideas are very different from other kinds of... Read More
Perhaps I could make a lot of money by founding... Read More
Parenting |