Dear Camille,
As I thumb through the photographs that I carry with me always in my briefcase, it's hard to fathom that the short haired, smiling baby holding a crawfish and wiggling its claws has turned into the beautiful goldilocks girl that demands the stage and wants so much to sing.
I feel like such a clich?-all those veteran parents telling us how quickly you would grow up, how it would be over before we know it, how we had best pay attention before it all ended.
They were right.
I can't believe you turned three.
I can't believe the seasons change so fast, the questions change so fast, though the answers seem so much alike.
I sit on airplanes and think of you often, what kind of stewardship do we offer, who truly teaches who, the empty feeling that hovers around me like a morning mist when we spend too much time apart.
I ponder the choices, the justifications, the selfishness that allows laziness to creep in, the myriad moments of ire that warrant only tenderness, the loss of control over small matters of tedium, the fragile balance between patience, guidance and the human condition that reveals its shadowy self in petty outbursts, orders and even shouting matches-the release valve that leaves ashes of hurt with little resolve.
What is my job?
Outside of protection from physical harm, I bob on this sea of life like a tiny cork in a hurricane, reaching within, seeking, trying to embrace and express, wondering how I might ever qualify to tell you or anyone how to live.
In the end, the old adage that the more we know the more we realize we don't know takes hold, anchors me to a journey of discovery and serves as a reminder that my conundrum evaporates if I focus on love, my role to baste you in it, wrap you up in a love cloud and cover you with a love blanket, that you may grow in love and let the other lessons flow to you and through you at your own pace.
This I can do, shrug off the coat of inadequacy and give you another hug, another kiss, another kind word, another minute when minutes run short, another chance, another smile, another deep breath to choke down the critic or the tyrant or the fictional pundit that so quickly jumps to judgment and wants to intervene.
No, father doesn't know best.
Father struggles to understand.
Father wrestles with his most important job.
Father tries so hard to heed his own counsel, to listen-both to the words and the unspoken, the undercurrents, the needs, the emotions that rage, then play, then rage, then rest, then come back to rage again.
Father cares-though the jumbled blend of empowerment, co-dependency, heart, guilt, duty, honor, passion and profound, profound affection sometimes do more to confuse than enlighten.
I guess we all tread the path, rain or shine, winter and summer, paved flat and mountainous, rocky trails.
Father loves.
Father loves you, with all my might, a job I relish.
As long as the ticker ticks, it will always tick for you.
Dada
That's A View From The Ridge?
Ridgely invites you to subscribe to A View From The Ridge, an inspirational column that goes out around the world each week. Please visit http://www.aviewfromtheridge.com to subscribe and email Ridgely personally at http://www.aviewfromtheridge.com.
licensed cleaning services Park Ridge ..Ah, potty training! Go to a local bookseller and you... Read More
1. The Law of the BeastAs parents we need to... Read More
Are you worried about your child's reading habits? Perhaps you... Read More
The No Child Left Behind Act of 2001 is making... Read More
Mary, Mary, quite contrary, How does your garden grow? With... Read More
Mommy (Daddy), Why do those people want to hurt everyone?Last... Read More
Children and teenagers are relentlessly bombarded with merchandise that entices.... Read More
I've learned numerous, important lessons on life, motherhood and men... Read More
There are some grounds to assume that a cognitive dissonance... Read More
An estimated five million scooters will be sold this year... Read More
We begin forming healthy habits at a young age. With... Read More
She slipped her small, soft eight-year-old hand into mine. Her... Read More
The public school system in America has become a dismal... Read More
The main thing we noticed since having a baby is... Read More
Many of us have grown up drinking caffeinated diet sodas... Read More
Once the newness has worn off a little, you will... Read More
Meningitis is an inflammation of the membranes around the brain... Read More
Minus all meningitis thoughts. The flu symptons were strong. Headache,... Read More
Is there a difference between lazy and unmotivated? Why do... Read More
Here's a scene: A parent "might suddenly grab a happliy... Read More
Bedtime and children's sleep habits can cause nightmares - for... Read More
Loving your step-child can be both simple and hard. It... Read More
So your little Susie wants to join a competitive gymnastic... Read More
I recall somewhere in the recesses of my aging brain... Read More
Children explore the world around them and learn through pretend... Read More
on demand house cleaning Arlington Heights ..Not all parents subscribe to the notion of "tough love,"... Read More
What parent hasn't gone into a son's or daughter's room... Read More
You are at the grocery store with your daughter and... Read More
It's no surprise that the self-image and self-esteem of overweight... Read More
Is your weekly shopping trip with the kids an absolute... Read More
Home, home on the range, Where never is heard A... Read More
Detox To Conceive.. If you're having trouble conceiving... Read More
As a mother of two sets of fraternal boy/girl twins,... Read More
It was the homework that did it. Each night became... Read More
Parents, do you have children who do poorly in school,... Read More
My daughters and I went to the beach several weeks... Read More
I remember watching my 18-month-old son eat a big frosted... Read More
We adopted our first child when he was three months... Read More
Coping with a child's bad behavior, perhaps more than any... Read More
The main thing we noticed since having a baby is... Read More
I hear from many parents that their child is stressed... Read More
People always ask my wife and I: "How did you... Read More
When it comes to the treatment of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity... Read More
It is hard to believe that summer is coming to... Read More
When you talk about multiply your child's intelligence, you can't... Read More
As part of the whole-language (or "balanced") reading-instruction philosophy, many... Read More
We were sitting in the family room. My kids had... Read More
What's in a name? Er?well, everything, really! Of course your... Read More
I will cherish this moment. I will not let it... Read More
It is human nature to feel competitive and envious toward... Read More
Parenting |