Ever feel like you're out of the loop when it comes to the unspoken rules of kids party etiquette?
Experienced Moms and Dads know the do's and don'ts of both hosting and attending kids parties.
Here are some pearls of wisdom from these parent experts to those just starting out on the party circuit...
INVITATIONS
The rule of thumb passed down by experienced Moms and Dads is to invite the same number of party guests as your child's age. Resist the temptation to invite every child in your child's classroom. Be discrete and avoid hurt feelings by mailing invitations home instead of passing them out in school. A manageable party is a more enjoyable one both for the party attendants and for you!
PARTY TIME AND DURATION
An hour is sufficient for toddlers and pre-schoolers when naptimes are still an issue. Plan your party when the birthday child will be freshest and best able to handle all the excitement, perhaps a morning brunch is best.
For older school age children, a two to three hour party at any time of day is a safe bet; evening parties and sleep-overs are popular options for pre-teens.
RSVPs
Always include an RSVP date and phone number on your party invitations. In the event of a guest failing to RSVP, a cordial call on or after your RSVP date is perfectly acceptable. Sometimes mail is delayed and other mishaps occur, and you need to be sure that the invitation was received. In addition, knowing the exact guest count is necessary for planning purposes.
GIFT GAFFES
Children may sometimes express their true, and not necessarily polite, feelings about a gift they have received. In advance of the party, explain to your child that it's necessary to thank all the gift-givers with equal enthusiasm, no matter what the gift. Impress upon your him or her that each guest feels their gift is special, and that it's the thought behind it that counts.
If you plan to open gifts at the party, make it early before kids are tired, cranky and hyped with sugar. Of course, this issue can be avoided entirely by opening the gifts after guests have departed, a time-saving practice which prevents the embarrassment of the party child making ungrateful comments.
COMPETITIVE GAMES
There's nothing wrong with good old-fashioned competition; it gets the adrenalin going and cranks up the excitement. Just make sure that the elements of each game are manageable for the age group you are inviting. A trial run with the party child prior to the party will likely head off any problems.
In addition, small gifts such as a lollipop or small trinkets given to every player for completing the game is preferable to awarding one large prize to the winner only. Planning a craft activity or end-of-party reading time will involve all the guests, even the quieter ones.
SIBLINGS SHOWING UP UNINVITED
Be very clear on your party invitation by using the name of the guest invited. Some people will ignore the obvious and do what's convenient for them anyway, so have a few extra goodie bags on hand for siblings who just show up.
BACK-UP PLANS
If you're having an outdoor party, it's good common sense to have a rainy day alternative. Confirm your entertainer one week before party time, but prepare a handful of games you can orchestrate on your own, if necessary. If a guest or two are late for the festivities, don't delay your schedule but keep on as planned. Although no-shows, delays, and inclement weather are party bummers, you can still pull it off like professional with a little advance preparation.
PARTY CHILD MISBEHAVING
Here's where some advance coaching is in order. Emphasize the important role your child has as the party host or hostess to make guests feel comfortable. Discuss the responsibilities s/he will have such as greeting the guests, showing them where to sit at the party table, and handing out party favors. Stress that through helping others enjoy the day, your child will likely have a better time too. A gentle reminder during the party should be all that's needed once you've laid down the ground rules.
GUESTS MISBEHAVING
The party excitement, coupled with sugar intake, can lead to tantrums, tears, and other misbehavior. Step back a moment and try to handle these problems with patience and diplomacy. A little attention and redirection is sometimes all that's needed to remedy the situation.
Give the child a special job to do or make them an honorary party helper. If the behavior escalates, don't be afraid to separate the child to a quiet room. Explain that bad behavior will not be tolerated and that the parents will be called to take him or her home if it continues.
DUPLICATE GIFT DILEMMA
If there's a gift receipt attached from a thoughtful parent, you're golden. Otherwise, don't get into it with another parent unless you can do so without causing offense. You can try just returning the gift for store credit, if you know where it was purchased. Or, stash it away with the name of the original gift-giver taped to it. This way you can recycle the gift, making sure it goes to an entirely new (and hopefully appreciative) child.
THANK YOU NOTES
Thank you notes are an excellent way to promote good manners and appreciation in your children. Not only are they important social skill builders, they foster good writing and creativity as well. Kids will learn to enjoy writing thank you cards if you make it a fun project by using colorful note cards and glittery gel pens or let them design their own on the computer.
For younger children, it's OK for the parent to write the note and have the party child sign it. The party child could even draw a picture which Mom or Dad can copy and send as a thank you. The "fill-in-the-blanks" type thank you note are a great alternative too. Another super idea is to include a picture of the guest taken with the party child along with the thank you note.
Incidentally, it's critical to keep a careful list of who-gave-what so thank you notes can be sent without mix-ups.
CAN PARENTS STAY?
If you're unsure if you can accompany your child to a party, just be up front with the parents beforehand and ask what their party plans are. The RSVP call is a great time to ask questions. Most parents of younger children know some kids are more comfortable with their parents around and plan accordingly. (A pot of coffee and extra cake or munchies for the adults.) Most parents will offer to help if they stay - an extra bonus for the host/hostess!
Copyright 2004 Kids Party Paradise All Rights Reserved
Patricia B. Jensen is a mother of three and kids party enthusiast. She is the webmaster and owner of kids-party-paradise.com - a complete resource for kids party ideas including invitations, cakes, decorations, games, costumes, favors, and food.
For all the latest party news, read her kids-party-paradise.com.
maide service in Park Ridge ..When our oldest son was 2, my wife went out... Read More
Every now and then I'll get a story sent to... Read More
Is it hard to communicate with your teenager about issues... Read More
Learning responsibility is an ever widening and lifelong process.As thinking,... Read More
Although it's hard to say when the first stuffed dogs... Read More
"Will my doubts and fears affect my child?" This father... Read More
Sex has a lot to answer for ? babies usually... Read More
Many people consider plush toys great for children. They say... Read More
My name is Duncan and I'm 2 years old. I... Read More
Baby names are as diverse as the people to whom... Read More
Certainly we all want our children to excel. But it... Read More
I had just completed a session with 17-year old Julie... Read More
For any parent, learning that a convicted sex offender lives... Read More
When you hear the phrase, 'guerrilla parenting techniques', what images... Read More
Do you know what these famous people have in common?Alexander... Read More
It's back to school time again. Does the thought of... Read More
For parents, keeping our kids safe is a constant top... Read More
Having a baby is one of the most exciting times... Read More
The learning and development of Australian kids is under threat... Read More
Have you ever experienced one of those days when you... Read More
Children are moral and make moral determinations... at least until... Read More
Fizzy sherbet in a paper bag with a strawberry lollipop... Read More
To every thing there is a season, and a time... Read More
For any of you Moms out there that are doing... Read More
Is there anything wrong with lying, cheating, stealing, shop-lifting, taking... Read More
after renovation cleaning Highland Park ..Something happened the other day that made me feel uneasy.... Read More
Researchers have estimated that 25-35% of children in the United... Read More
The First Reason: For one thing, child development experts are... Read More
How often do you think of family life as an... Read More
You have two kids who are 14 months apart. How... Read More
For many years underparenting was perhaps the biggest problem facing... Read More
On a recent Saturday evening, I noticed a young teen-age... Read More
In 1996-97 we were contracted by VAXA International of Tampa,... Read More
According to the American Sleep Association 70% of all babies... Read More
Though you can cover even very long distances by car... Read More
What is child sexual abuse? Any sexual activity that is... Read More
Goal setting is essential for building a successful life. However,... Read More
Summer Survival The... Read More
As a parent is seems that the majority of your... Read More
Thank you to all of our professional educators who dedicate... Read More
"You can learn many things from children. How much patience... Read More
Winnie the Pooh is the classic picture of Inattentive ADHD.... Read More
One of the most important aspects of parenting, is ensuring... Read More
Valentine day has always been a special day in my... Read More
The main thing we noticed since having a baby is... Read More
There's a new trend for party entertainment. It seems as... Read More
Parents of hyperactive children know the "Would you please just... Read More
How are parents to know they are doing the right... Read More
Parents want their children to succeed in school. However, sometimes... Read More
Every children in the world whishes to have toys and... Read More
Parenting |