"The other night I ate at a real family restaurant. Every table had an argument going."
One of the biggest obstacles to personal and career success is anger. When we fail to control our anger, we suffer several blows:
People are beginning to wake up to the dangers of anger and the need for anger management programs and strategies. Many people find anger easy to control. Yes, they do get angry. Everybody does. But some people find anger easier to manage than others. More people need to develop anger management skills.
For those who have a tough time controlling their anger, an anger management plan might help. Think of this as your emotional control class, and try these self-help anger management tips:
Ask yourself this question: "Will the object of my anger matter ten years from now?" Chances are, you will see things from a calmer perspective.
Ask yourself: "What is the worst consequence of the object of my anger?" If someone cut in front of you at the book store check-out, you will probably find that three minutes is not such a big deal.
Imagine yourself doing the same thing. Come on, admit that you sometimes cut in front of another driver, too ... sometimes by accident. Do you get angry at yourself?
Ask yourself this question: "Did that person do this to me on purpose?" In many cases, you will see that they were just careless or in a rush, and really did not mean you any harm.
Try counting to ten before saying anything. This may not address the anger directly, but it can minimize the damage you will do while angry.
Try some "new and improved" variations of counting to ten. For instance, try counting to ten with a deep slow breathe in between each number. Deep breathing -- from your diaphragm -- helps people relax.
Or try pacing your numbers as you count. The old "one-steamboat-two-steamboat, etc." trick seems kind of lame to me. Steamboats are not the best devices to reduce your steam. How about "One-chocolate-ice-cream-two-chocolate-ice-cream", or use something else that you find either pleasant or humorous.
Visualize a relaxing experience. Close your eyes, and travel there in your mind. Make it your stress-free oasis.
One thing I do not recommend is "venting" your anger. Sure, a couple swift blows to your pillow might make you feel better (better, at least, than the same blows to the door!), but research shows that "venting" anger only increases it. In fact, speaking or acting with any emotion simply rehearses, practices and builds that emotion.
If these tips do not help at all and you still feel you cannot manage your anger and the related stress, you may need some professional help, either in the form of a therapist specializing in anger management or a coach with a strong background in psychology.
About The Author
David Leonhardt is the Happy Guy (http://thehappyguy.com), author of "Climb your Stairway to Heaven: the 9 habits of maximum happiness at http://thehappyguy.com For more tips on controlling anger, boosting self-esteem, expressing gratitude and reducing stress, pick up a copy of The Get Happy Workbook (http://thehappyguy.com)
affordable house cleaning Wilmette ..The other day one of my "challenging clients" and I... Read More
Maureen worked in an office with twenty other people, processing... Read More
Do you know the problem with affirmations? You know, the... Read More
I'm a working mother with a preschooler, worrying about Mom... Read More
How are you? Where do you get a positive attitude... Read More
Changing your mindset can have a significant impact on achieving... Read More
Apart form the Emotions and the attitude, Anger is a... Read More
Do you really believe that there is anything in this... Read More
Good morning I love you.This is a basic exercise, which... Read More
If you suffer from low self-esteem, it's because you don't... Read More
Lately, there has been a collective challenge to avoid being... Read More
Byron and I started our first business full of enthusiasm... Read More
Do you realize that what we believe about ourselves, affects... Read More
Have you ever considered that you may be subconsciously sabotaging... Read More
Did you know that the 911 equivalent in the UK... Read More
Contrary to the popular saying "attitude is everything" attittude is... Read More
The quality of your life is directly related to your... Read More
"In life, if you give yourself a concession, you'd take... Read More
How you feel about yourself truly does affect your interaction... Read More
One thing that is important to realize about thought: one... Read More
Have you ever read that you should think positively when... Read More
"The knowledge of actions or events before they occur; foresight."You... Read More
Changing Negative Thoughts into Positive Thoughts is a key lesson... Read More
We all have a unique way of communicating our story,... Read More
The invisible force surrounded him, squeezing tightly around his chest.... Read More
quick home cleaning Northbrook ..There was someone I used to work with who, well... Read More
Many people would say that it is absolute madness to... Read More
One of the most important aspects of living a healthy... Read More
Speaking comes to most people as naturally as breathing. On... Read More
Bernard always had a problem with money.He was always lacking... Read More
One Friday in November, I began a journey from New... Read More
"At birth, a baby's brain contains 100 billion neurons, roughly... Read More
There are many stories of people injuring themselves, and others,... Read More
"Someone was hurt before you; wronged before you, hungry before... Read More
Do you really believe that there is anything in this... Read More
Changing your mindset can have a significant impact on achieving... Read More
Every emotion, wether we classify it as good or bad,... Read More
In view of the increasing negative events happening around the... Read More
In frustration it's easy to jump to false conclusions that... Read More
Ten tips to transform your move into a creative life... Read More
Knowing yourself is the foundation of self-esteem, self confidence and... Read More
Do you ever find yourself thinking, "Life has taught me... Read More
We hear a lot these days about accepting responsibility for... Read More
There are many dynamics that go into making a great... Read More
I Hear Voices?This is not a statement of paranormal; it... Read More
Most of us carry on a running internal dialogue at... Read More
The only thing between you and your desire to be... Read More
What do you do when things in your life don't... Read More
Look for the positives!Seek them out - those little scary... Read More
Recently, a dear friend who has been both a coach... Read More
Positive Attitude Tips |