When we were children, we were fearless. We would stick our hands in the fire, chew on the beetle bugs, and eat that dirt. But, over time, we learned those things that we should not do through experience and from "parental voices" --- those baseless fears passed down through the generations. Later in life, we learned that fire burns, beetle bugs are "yucky" and dirt is not nutritious. But, we also learned all of the things that our parents learned, including their fears and phobias, and integrated those lessons into our own "belief systems."
Our belief systems are the basis of our personalities and the foundations of our directions in life --- they are the rules by which we live. In essence, our fears, desires, and values define each of us. We are what we believe --- including our fears. However, consider what your current fears are that prevent you from moving forward. Realize that these fears are of things that we were taught and those things that we learned on our own --- in the past. Fear is based on past experiences and not on those things that we have not yet encountered. With that, we only fear what we've "already experienced." The "fear of the unknown" is doubt in the future based on the circumstances that we've encountered in the past.
Since we are what we believe, we can change who we are by enhancing our belief systems. To overcome your fears, you must first determine if the fear is based on something learned through experience or taught to us by parental voices. Fears that are taught or passed down to us can be more prominent than those we learn from personal experiences because we don't know why we fear such things. We can overcome fears through rational thinking if we're able to learn why such situations occurred that caused the fear. But, if we don't know the basis, we won't look further because we fear what we "might" find.
If you don't know why you have certain fears and cannot rationalize them, they need to be eliminated. Baseless fears are unreal and create a false blockage and a reason to give up, surrender, and rest in a comfort zone. Determine which fears are baseless and replace them with practical experiences. Realistic fears based on actual experiences can be rationalized and resolved. These resolutions can then be integrated into our lives to learn lessons and move forward in life.
Once we are able to define and diffuse our core fears, we can then rely on the fear of returning to our prior state or not succeeding in our life to drive us forward. You can then devise a plan of action to reach your Vision and focus on desires of success and fulfillment instead of hiding in the dark from the empty fears of our "parental voices."
About The Author
Edward B. Toupin is an author, life-strategy coach, counselor, Reiki Master, technical writer, and PhD Candidate living in Las Vegas, NV. Among other things, he authors books, articles, and screenplays on topics ranging from career success through life organization and fulfillment. Check out some of his recent print and electronic books as well as his articles covering various life-changing topics!
For more information, e-mail Edward at etoupin@toupin.com or visit his site at etoupin@toupin.com or etoupin@toupin.com!
Copyright (c) 2004 Edward B. Toupin
Culver prom limo ..As a being of thought, your dominant mental attitude will... Read More
Water is an important tool for magic rituals in many... Read More
Speaking comes to most people as naturally as breathing. On... Read More
Many of us allow our fear to stop us in... Read More
As I walked my dogs recently on what "should" have... Read More
Are feelings and attitudes the same thing or different? Does... Read More
"If you don't like something, change it. If you can't... Read More
Have you ever felt the whole world was against you?... Read More
Look at this glass on the table in front of... Read More
Have you ever thought about you have a lot to... Read More
Clear Conflict with Forgiveness:Forgiveness is the means to solve all... Read More
Have you heard of the FABS? The FABS are quadruplets;... Read More
When you're feeling "low," or out of the flow, it's... Read More
Dear Friends,All human beings have a unique ability right from... Read More
With the beginning of a new year, are you happy... Read More
If you work toward what you dream, the dream can... Read More
Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.... Read More
I went online -- and what do I see? A... Read More
As a trainer of coaches I often teach my students... Read More
What do you do when things in your life don't... Read More
Life shouldn't be so complicated. Have you ever wondered why... Read More
Apart form the Emotions and the attitude, Anger is a... Read More
I don't want to say people are basically negative but?..if... Read More
Kasia is a talented landscape designer who speaks several languages,... Read More
Near the end of December 2004, I received an email... Read More
Wood Dale limo ..I once heard the story of a grown bear that... Read More
"I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious."... Read More
Smart folk have always realised how vital it is to... Read More
You've been looking for a job for as long as... Read More
Your response (reaction?) to change is conditioned by your entire... Read More
What are you holding onto? Wanta quit?There are many things... Read More
I woke up this morning feeling sour.No. That's an understatement.... Read More
How many times have you heard someone say, "Hey, cheer... Read More
Know thyself.These words were inscribed in the vestibule of the... Read More
"Putting ourselves down, is an insult to our worth." --Helen... Read More
Who can control a smile sneaking across your face as... Read More
What's my life all about is the question so many... Read More
Never used 'em. Not likely to start now.OK, so I... Read More
Turn brutality into kindness. There is no small deed and... Read More
Think for a moment about all of the signals people... Read More
The only constant is change. If theres one thing we... Read More
There is a wonderful story about the famous escape artist,... Read More
ARE YOU IN... OR OUT?Are you in or out of... Read More
Our thoughts define who we are. They can make us... Read More
I don't know about you, but for me, the technological... Read More
Just 2 nights ago my partner and I were watching... Read More
Human nature is created so that you can choose your... Read More
There are many dynamics that go into making a great... Read More
"Where are your bananas?" It seemed like a logical question... Read More
I started life writing in the fifth grade. My mother... Read More
Positive Attitude Tips |