10 Points on Children for the New Parent

I remember when my daughter was born, later my son. According to many well meaning individuals, I should've done this, should've done that and maybe improved in some areas.

Most times I appreciated their pearls of wisdom because they made sense. At other times the line dividing the 'yes we can talk about this' crossed over into 'the no go zone' and I would bristle and spit like an angry cat! In the end, for my sanity, I did it my way.

I'm a granny now and I now provide well meaning advice to my daughter who is much like me ? you can well imagine what she's thinking!

I returned to the workforce within 12 months after each pregnancy, and every time I found I was in conflict with me. One part of me wanted to get out there again, and the other didn't want to leave my children. Although I was getting my life back, inwardly I still wondered whether I was doing the right thing or not. I worked through it with the support and love of very dear friends and now am glad I did things the way I did. I'm proud to say my children have turned out to be exceptional individuals who love me as much as I love them.

The following worked extremely well for me and may also do likewise for you:

1. Take the words of others in good grace ? accept what you know will be the most congruent for yourself and family. At the end of the day, friends, acquaintances and other family members who give advice on how you should be doing it, live under a different roof.

2. If confused about all the advice you receive from others, take some time to ask yourself "what is important to me in all this?"

3. Do yourself a favour - arm yourself with the knowledge that if you join support groups or socialise with others, there will be times you're going to receive unsolicited advice. Just smile and nod.

4. If you find yourself in states of hopelessness, sadness, and gloom you're unable to shake regardless of what you do ? seek help from professionals. I had post natal depression with both my children and it wasn't until I actually started to receive the help I needed that I could finally see the light around me.

5. Make a list of three different things you do each day that creates anxiety for you. With each point ask yourself the five questions below:

"What is the purpose of doing this?"

"How important is doing this, really?"

"What do I need to do now that will help reduce my anxiety?"

"What is the positive aspect of this?"

"What is it costing me?"

When you're done, put your list away and come back to it later. Once you read the list again, check if you still feel the same about the three points. If you do, brainstorm a few ideas on how you could do things differently. If the points no longer having pulling power and you're ok with it ? congratulate yourself!

6. Start a meditation program. Use this opportunity for some 'me time'. If you're new to meditation, there are some great how to books out there, CD's and meditation workshops. There's even an e-book titled 'Book of 10 Colour Meditation Scripts' so you can record your voice using these scripts written by yours truly.

7. Slowly start doing some of the things you used to prior to baby arriving ? it is possible. Start with the absolute smallest and gradually work your way up. I started writing bits of poetry, and lists, I often wrote lists and loved it.

8. Retain your identity by keeping in contact with friends ? even if it's only by phone.

9. Self esteem may plummet to an all time low; sleep deprivation a common event, and you may experience discomfort as your identity shifts from the old you to the new you. There is an upshot to all this (there's always one). You've taken on one of society's biggest roles ? that of motherhood with your child potentially a future leader of this country!

10. Enjoy and make the very most of this precious time because it will pass much too quickly. Although a grandmother now, I still remember the day my daughter and son was born. It's as clear as if it happened yesterday.

I've never been more exhausted than when my children were little. Sleep deprivation was torture so in order to cope I let go of being the perfect house cleaner, cook, and social butterfly ? the perfect someone. It simply wasn't important anymore and knew it was all there waiting for me when the time was right, and know it will for you too.

Michaela is a Transformational Coach, certified practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), writer and Metaphysician who is totally committed to helping others create positive and action oriented changes to their lives (see http://www.michaelascherr.com)

Michaela is the author of several e-books including Book of 10 Colour Meditation Scripts and publisher of a monthly newsletter called From My Desk.

Married to David, Michaela has two children and a grandchild and currently lives in Brisbane Australia.

Oswego taxi to Midway ..
In The News:

Hackers and scammers keep looking for ways to break into your Facebook account. Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson has some tips to make sure your account is secure.
Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson shows you how to create group texts to reach multiple people at once — and also how to leave them if you get annoyed at the volume of interruptions.
Tax fraud is on the rise, and hackers are now using identity hijacking and artificial intelligence for tax returns in someone else's name to get a refund.
Toyota's Punyo soft robot mimics human behavior, using its chest, hips and arms — in addition to its hands — like a human to handle objects,
Hackers used third-party information to break into Roku accounts, according to the streaming company. Roku says it has secured affected accounts.
Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.
Kurt "CyberGuy" Knutsson explains the simple steps for setting a Wi-Fi hot spot on an Android. If you have internet on your phone, it's easy.
Dubai recently hosted the first jet suit race with a backdrop of skyscrapers, and one observer says it was straight out of a comic book.
Kim Komando introduces ways to keep you and your devices safe while traveling. The clever hacks mentioned can protect you from hackers and jackers.
TikTok CEO Shou Chew published a video Wednesday urging users to "protect your constitutional rights" against a bipartisan bill that would force China to divest from the app.
Tech guru Kurt "CyberGuy" Knutsson says you can never be too careful with tech passwords. He explains how to keep your information safe.
The Lighthouse in New Zealand rotates 360 degrees, constantly giving those inside different views around the clock. Built in the 1990s, it's up for sale.
High school students in Colorado are learning how to design their own AI model projects, including cameras for self-driving cars and apps that can teach other languages.
Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.
Vehicles collect sensitive personal information, which is used to set auto insurance rates. That's partly why auto insurance premiums are rising.
Honda's Uni-One is a hands-free electric mobility device that can reach speeds of 3.7 mph and support a user weighing up to 242 pounds.
Kim Komando puts three AI chatbots head-to-head to decide which is the best assistant for modern problems. Compare Google Gemini, ChatGPT, and Perplexity.
To safeguard personal information on iPhones, users can employ built-in security measures and iCloud Keychain for enhanced privacy. Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson shows you how.
Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson introduces you to the City Transformer’s CT-2 electric car, which can seamlessly transition from 8 feet wide on the road to a compact 3 feet for parking.
Hackers are always looking for new ways to trick targets into downloading malware. Now, they're after cryptocurrency folks via Calendly. Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson has the details.
Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson reveals how the Microlino Lite, a compact and eco-friendly vehicle, tackles city traffic congestion with its chic design and small dimensions.
A new funeral scam targets surviving family members of those who recently died. Scammers reach out to the survivors and pose as funeral home officials.
Merlin Labs' autonomous pilot could soon hit the commercial airways and may help alleviate a looming pilot shortage, according to CEO Matt George.
There's a simple way to check your subscriptions on an Android and cancel them. Tech guru Kurt "CyberGuy" Knutsson explains how it is done.
Hackers use pirated software to target macOS, Android and Windows devices in search of stealing cryptocurrency, according to Kurt "CyberGuy" Knutsson.

Your Child?s Self-Esteem is in The Cards

Research has shown that the present generation of children worldwide... Read More

What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?

Q. "What do you want to be when you grow... Read More

Helpful Tips for the Adoptive Grandparent

Few things are more completely enjoyable than becoming a grandparent.... Read More

The Cost of Competition on Kids

The subject of competition is one that provokes some pretty... Read More

Treatment Options for ADHD

Ritalin has been shown through the years to be very... Read More

Homeschooling --- A Superior Education For Your Child

Home-schooling provides children with a superior education. Parents can quickly... Read More

You Dont Need a Supernanny to Be an Active Parent

The hot new reality TV show "Nanny 911" has been... Read More

Back to School Care Packages!

I am crying tears of joy mixed with great sadness... Read More

How to Make Kids More Likeable?

Nothing touches the heartstrings of a parent more than the... Read More

Three Tips to Get Children with Sleeping Problems Asleep

According to the American Sleep Association 70% of all babies... Read More

Strategies to Help Boost Your Childs Self Esteem

Self esteem in an important quality for all children to... Read More

Quality Time with Your Teen

It's sometimes difficult to find ways to be involved with... Read More

Are You Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child?

Although many parents are concerned with our children's intelligence quotient... Read More

March of the Penguins - A Fun Learnig Tool

Everyone loves penguins. And now, everyone has a chance to... Read More

What Values Are We Giving Our Children?

On a bright Sunday morning, a couple of weeks ago,... Read More

Bless Your Child With The Name

What a dreamer I am when thinking about parenthood. Most... Read More

Nanny 911 and Disciplining Your Child

Nanny 911 Interview with Montel WilliamsI saw an interview with... Read More

Top 50 Mom Quotations

"All that I am or ever hope to be, I... Read More

The ABCs of Raising Twins

As a mother of two sets of fraternal boy/girl twins,... Read More

Watering Your Young Child?s Mind

Mary, Mary, quite contrary, How does your garden grow? With... Read More

Dads, Give them Household Chores

You have a chore to do around the house, and... Read More

Television - The Great SATAN!

I've often thought that in 6 million years, archaeologists will... Read More

How Children Learn

Nurture and TeachThe single most important thing caregivers can do... Read More

Are Parents Trying Too Hard?

One of the implications of the current trend toward smaller... Read More

We All Wish That Our Children Have Good Virtues, But... Are We Setting A Good Example Ourselves?

We all wish that our children should not smoke or... Read More

shuttle from Midway Morris ..