Unhappy moods can be like comfortable sweaters, those old ones: familiar, worn and with the right kind of smell. When we're in a sad place, or actually with any dissatisfied feelings, we want that comfy sweater. We actually can feel really safe wearing it. It's dark and cozy. Choosing to feel the full feeling of those emotions are powerful. In some way wrapping that sweater tight, we are powerful.
Bad moods are seductive this way. When our sorrows claim us, then we demand attention, and sympathy. We're the object of our friend's attention. And when the universe makes sure no one is home when you call, there's that cozy sweater again, that old sweatshirt, or those bed covers. The lure is even stronger.
The problem is that when we're ruled by these emotions-oh yes. We're not really in control here-we're not happy. That is not to say those feelings are not important. There are reasons to be angry, to sorrow, and to grieve. We need those emotions as much as laughter, but it is easy to let those emotions seduce us into lingering there long after the fight or the crying is done.
You know what happens if you wear an article of clothing too long? You don't wash it, you don't let it air out in the warm breeze and touched by the warmth of the sun? Yeah. It gets smelly and unpleasant. Ich.
You really cannot stay that way. So when that fusty sweater gets too cozy, it's time to take a deep breath and find some other article of clothing to wear. Literally. Or you could make yourself a scrumptious brunch, or read a funny story, or watch a funny move. Even better call a friend over for dinner. This can be tough. Why? Because you don't want to indulge in more angst. You took off the sweater. Focus on cooking or ordering in some fabulous meal to share; light candles. Talk about something different. Find out what's going on with them.
Choose a change of pace.
There are times happiness is an act of will. When those blue feelings become familiar, it's hard work to look for contentment. If the sad feelings trap you, beyond their natural course, you have to decide you want a different emotion. It does not have to be a sudden switch. Our emotions do not really work like that. It isn't like turning a light on. Sometimes it means taking several moments during the day and take a few deep breaths and just look outside, or think of something positive.
After a while, that change of pace, those moments of deep breath and stillness and you find that the warm breeze is running its fingers through your hair and the warm sun is caressing your face. And the true gift of sorrow is revealed. We know how much this joy is worth.
About The Author
Maria Boers Morris has published short stories, one at www.writershood.com, and an e-book on Creating Positive Thought, at www.writershood.com. More motivational e-books will be available through www.writershood.com in the near future.
Have you ever dreaded an upcoming presentation, meeting or function... Read More
I will never forget an evening in 2003, when I... Read More
Woe is me... life has dealt me a bad hand...... Read More
Why do we help others? There is a whole lot... Read More
"We can change our circumstances by a mere change of... Read More
"If I have the belief that I can do it,... Read More
The universe is vast, it's dimensions inconceivable, it's potentialities unimaginable,... Read More
I once heard the story of a grown bear that... Read More
It's a fact of life - if you want to... Read More
In many ways the Star War movies are simply a... Read More
Everyone of us has the potential to successfully more through... Read More
Turn brutality into kindness. There is no small deed and... Read More
Everything exists twice. First, in your mind. Later, before you... Read More
Ever witnessed an incident that needed to be reported to... Read More
? If it takes me to periphery (Drifted into continuous... Read More
How you feel about yourself truly does affect your interaction... Read More
If you work toward what you dream, the dream can... Read More
If you suffer from low self-esteem, it's because you don't... Read More
When someone thinks of a person with self-esteem most people... Read More
Our thoughts really belong to the collective consciousness of the... Read More
IntroductionDid your boss, took you for a ride? Did your... Read More
Sometimes we are in a position to look into the... Read More
Never used 'em. Not likely to start now.OK, so I... Read More
One of the biggest potential problems we face with every... Read More
One day while in deep meditation and self analysis, a... Read More
Every time something doesn't go quite right (rather frequently for... Read More
In view of the increasing negative events happening around the... Read More
Are you completely happy in your life right now? Honestly?... Read More
Clear Conflict with Forgiveness:Forgiveness is the means to solve all... Read More
With Thanksgiving approaching, I thought it would be especially appropriate... Read More
While trying to ignore my teen daughters rap music a... Read More
Quote of the week:"Of all the attitudes we can acquire,... Read More
Smart folk have always realised how vital it is to... Read More
Look at this glass on the table in front of... Read More
WE ARE ALL THINKING ALL OF THE TIME.Can you believe... Read More
For most of us our lives are a problem which... Read More
Sometimes we are in a position to look into the... Read More
If we are the products of our attitudes then it... Read More
Are you the kind of person who dwells on your... Read More
The infamous "glass ceiling" is blamed for business issues for... Read More
Celebrating is a skill that adults with ADD (Attention Deficit... Read More
The other day I bought an unusual piece of software:... Read More
Thousands of dollars will be yours, just by using your... Read More
I am often astounded at what and why people believe... Read More
A balanced life not only leaves you feeling more fulfilled;... Read More
During a Messenger chat session the other day, I asked... Read More
What's wrong with me? When I'm sick I get grumpy... Read More
An Attitude of Gratitude. How important is this to you... Read More
It started out as a windy, rainy day. A tropical... Read More
Studies show that men and women profit most with having... Read More
Positive Attitude Tips |