Let Go of Resentment

Maureen worked in an office with twenty other people, processing checks. She didn't particularly like her job, but she didn't particularly dislike it either. Getting ahead in her career wasn't important to her until the day that her friend and co-worker Betty was promoted to be the boss of the unit. Betty had not being doing the job as long as Maureen had, but Betty was always cheerful, hardworking and ambitious, where Maureen had been low-key and easy going.

Until Betty got the promotion, Maureen had been reasonable content at her work, even if she had not been outstandingly happy. But once Betty was made supervisor, Maureen began to fill up with resentment until she hated her job and hated Betty. Eventually she developed an ulcer because she was filled with anger all the time.

Maureen began to see Betty as the source of all her problems, and she failed to remember that she had not particularly wanted the promotion anyway. She just thought that it should be hers. Instead of examining herself to see what she really wanted out of life, and trying to figure out how she could get it, Maureen became focussed on her resentments.

Bill W, who was one of the original founders of the organization Alcoholics Anonymous, spent a lot of time focussing on the role that resentment played in people's lives.

Bill W wrote that perhaps an average person could afford to be resentful without causing too many problems, but he noticed that for a person who was an alcoholic and who wanted to learn how to create peace of mind, harboring resentment was a poison that could destroy lives and even drive recovering alcoholics back to drinking.

I'm sure that Bill W realized that a lot of average people have problems handling resentment as well, especially when they allow it to fester and grow.

One of the main problems with resentment is that in the short term, resentment can feel good. The anger you feel when you are resentful can energize you and seem to give you at least temporarily, a sense of purpose and drive.

The problems that resentment can cause usually show up later, when resentment becomes more than a short term emotional reaction to a real or imagined injustice. After a while, some people nurture their sense of resentment until it takes on a life of its own and seems to become a central focus in a person's life.

One of the major problems with resentment is that because it is directed outside of yourself, nursing resentment will keep you focussed on believing that your feelings of anger are entirely caused by some outward circumstance or outside person.

You stop taking responsibility for your own actions and feelings.

You stop looking for what you can do to improve your situation and you stop looking for the possibilities that remain open around you, because you decide that your negative feelings are someone else's fault. You stop trying to find real solutions to your problem.

You stop noticing and being grateful for what is actually good in your life.

If you decide that resentment is playing too big a role in your life, it's not always easy to change this habit. Most of the time you can't just decide to stop being resentful.

The first step is awareness. You need to notice and admit when you are feeling resentful, especially when you let it go on and on. You need to ask yourself if you are truly ready to be less resentful, and to look for ways that you can achieve real solutions in your life.

We can all find other people and other circumstances that we can blame for where we are in our lives, but once we make a habit of it, we stay stuck where we are. We need to move beyond blame and work on solutions.

Royane Real is the author of several self help books available at her website. Sign up for the free newsletter filled with self improvement ideas at http://www.royanereal.com

Rolling Meadows Cadillac Escalade rental .. Lockport Chicago limo O’Hare

In The News:

These 35 Chrome extensions have privacy and security concerns. Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says to delete them now.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says 329,000 mph fusion rocket promises to be fast, disruptive and enable deep-space missions.

Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says a new autonomous AI is a game changer that also raises privacy risks. Is your data safe?

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says robots and drones are revolutionizing fruit farming with faster picking and smarter handling.

Landmark Admin revises May 2024 cyberattack scope to show twice as many people were affected. Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson gives tips to help stay safe from an insurance data breach.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson talks about how Yamaha’s hydrogen outboard motor could revolutionize boating with zero emissions.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson reveals how to memorialize or remove a deceased loved one’s Facebook account and protect their digital legacy from misuse or scams.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says an Apple Watch saved psychiatrist Amanda Faulkner by detecting deadly leukemia early.

Scammers and fraudsters are increasingly targeting the most vulnerable, especially nursing homes and the personal data of their residents. Kurt the CyberGuy has safety tips.

Infected USB flash drives can spread malware among multiple organizations in ways that can easily bypass traditional security systems.

With a fully automated warehouse system and AI-powered robots, Ocado's Hive picks, packs and delivers grocery store orders in just a few minutes.

Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.

Recycling robots are using artificial intelligence to learn how to sort recyclables by recognizing patterns in colors, textures, shapes and logos.

The Reachy 2 robot is designed to be friendly and approachable, inviting natural interaction and is perfect for research, education and experimenting with embodied AI.

Kurt "CyberGuy" Knutsson shares several easy ways to keep your credit cards safe from digital thieves while you're traveling this summer.

Arcturus sets up cameras around the edges of baseball stadiums to capture real-time action and generate a 3D digital clone of the game.

Stay up to date on the latest AI technology advancements and learn about the challenges and opportunities AI presents now and for the future.

The CyberGuy explains why healthcare organizations are vulnerable to hackers after there have been a half dozen data breaches this year.

Developed at two California universities, the innovative technology combines brain-computer interfaces with advanced AI to decode neural activity into audible speech.

Microsoft patches 12 critical flaws, but six have already been exploited by criminals. Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says updating your system is only a short-term fix.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson discusses how robots can milk, feed and clean cows on dairy farms, boosting efficiency and comfort.

Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson says quantum internet ensures unhackable security and redefines online privacy and speed.

Kawasaki's CORLEO is a hydrogen-powered, AI-driven rideable robot. Tech expert Kurt “CyberGuy" Knutsson reports on this new way of thinking about off-road transportation.

The CyberGuy breaks down five mobile privacy terms that could make a difference when it comes to keeping your personal information safe.

Let Go of Resentment

Positive Attitude Tips