Finding out that a child has been born with a disability, or that a previously healthy child has suffered an injury or disease that causes a disability can be the most traumatic moment in a parent's life. Shock is usually the first thing people experience. It can temporarily paralyze you, preventing you from taking action, or even making rational decisions. In this difficult first period it is always wise to take the counsel of professionals and family members with experience or others whom you trust, while always maintaining the right to make the final decision yourselves.
After coming to grips with the shock of their situation, many parents come to feel that their expectations have been dashed, that they are failures as parents or that their family has been destroyed. Uncertainty, blame or jealousy may arise. Parents may worry about hundreds of questions that have few immediate answers which can lead to an unbalanced and overly bleak view of the opportunities, potential, and joy that can be found in raising a child with a disability.
These emotions however are normal; part of a "mourning" process that many parents of children with disabilities go through. If you have these feelings, remember that you are not the only ones who feel this way, and that you will get over them. You can adjust more quickly by obtaining accurate information, sharing your feelings openly with others, seeking professional counseling, and, most importantly, having open discussions with all members of your immediate family. With time, love, and support, any negative emotions you feel can be replaced by positive ones leading to productive actions that will benefit your child.
It is not the end of the world, and many families have become stronger, more loving, and more closely knit because of a disability in the family. The disability gave them the opportunity to work together to help out their loved one, and the entire family shares in the gains that are made by the child. Many of the negatives that parents imagine that go along with having a child who has a disability simply do not occur. While you will have to make some sacrifices, you will still have time for your friends, family, and hobbies. After awhile, many of the activities you once viewed as sacrifices will come to be seen as part of every life, rather than an exceptional burden.
Developing a positive attitude is very important, and although children with disabilities will inevitably become aware of their limitations, they should always be encouraged to take on new challenges. This is sometimes difficult as children with physical limitations may be reluctant to participate in physical activities out of fear of failure. Despite these fears, both the child's and the parent's perspective should be "have fun, and do your best."
Some parents of children with disabilities are unable to have their special child live at home with them, but the vast majority is able to successfully manage within the home. If you are finding you cannot cope, there are alternatives available that will allow you to maintain a loving relationship with your child while maximizing appropriate care.
The most important factor in a family's success is the motivation to succeed. If a child realizes that his parents always encourage success and will not be satisfied with anything less than his best effort, he will be motivated to succeed. Never settling for failure becomes part of his character, and his self-esteem will be enhanced and maintained.
There is a wide range of disabilities that affect children but the constant emphasis on always trying your best, reinforced in an atmosphere of warmth and support, will help any child with a disability triumph over the challenge that he will face. Instilling this confidence will help him have faith in himself and work on his own behalf throughout the course of his entire life.
About The Author
Dr. Mark Nagler is an acknowledged expert for people with disabilities. He was born with Cerebral Palsy and has triumphed over his disability by becoming an expert in the Disability Studies field. He has a B.A. from the University of British Columbia, a Masters degree from the University of Chicago and a Ph.D. from Stirling University in Britain. Dr. Nagler approaches disability from a different perspective than that offered by most experts and, although he has never been able to write, he was able to achieve his impressive array of degrees. He taught at Hamilton's McMaster University and the University of Waterloo and he has lectured across Canada, the United States, Britain, Sweden, Hungary and Israel. He has used his cerebral palsy to empower students, parents and anyone else with whom he comes in contact. His book, "Yes You Can", illustrates his own experience in over coming disability and his other work, "What's Stopping You?", conveys strategies that adults can successfully use in living with disability.
www.marknagler.com; www.marknagler.com
licensed cleaning services Park Ridge ..There is a new stage of development for parents to... Read More
We all want to comfort our children after they suffer... Read More
For every season, check, check, check, There is a chart,... Read More
Q: My husband and I are at a loss as... Read More
The legend and myth of the Tooth Fairy is a... Read More
Just two days ago, another 15-year old child was added... Read More
Q. With another school year starting, we are not sure... Read More
This is the third and final article in a series... Read More
If you are a member of a stepfamily, you know... Read More
There is no doubt that mothers play an all-important leading... Read More
Ritalin has been shown through the years to be very... Read More
Isn't the technology of today is amazing?! Between the speed... Read More
Dear Camille,As I thumb through the photographs that I carry... Read More
How bad is the illegal drug problem here in the... Read More
Everyone knows that exercise is good for your health. Exercising... Read More
Q. How do I overcome the 16-year-old who does things... Read More
The subject of competition is one that provokes some pretty... Read More
Oh yes you have! Suddenly, "Where's Bobby?" You instantly realize... Read More
IntroductionChildren are the gifts of God to parents. That young... Read More
There are moments in a parent's or grandparent's life, when... Read More
Many children are jittery on the first day of school.... Read More
Parental Alienation Syndrome was probably first identified and codified by... Read More
"All that I am or ever hope to be, I... Read More
"My son won't go to bed at night without a... Read More
Being in a competitive world, the lowest qualification to secure... Read More
on demand house cleaning Arlington Heights ..21 Reasons I Love Being A DadWhat you will read... Read More
We were all teens at one time for some many... Read More
Choosing a baby name is an important job, so make... Read More
This may come as a surprise, but many parents are... Read More
1. Tell me something you like about yourself? Help your... Read More
We know that you want your little guy or gal... Read More
There are millions of young children in this country who... Read More
One reason public schools get away with educational failure, year... Read More
Young people generally want to fit in to their various... Read More
Sex has a lot to answer for ? babies usually... Read More
'Picky Eater' is a label coined to describe the phenomenon... Read More
I could nearly fund my children's future education if I... Read More
Do you want to create a deeper, more loving relationship... Read More
A sure way to double the joys of parenthood is... Read More
Jason Meridith's two-year old son whines when he wants more... Read More
Speaking as a Michael (a Hebrew name, meaning "Who is... Read More
You can learn a lot from children.The best part of... Read More
Although many children are picky eaters at some stage in... Read More
Under the "No Child Left Behind Act," public schools whose... Read More
Back in college, I wrote for a five-day-a-week, award-winning campus... Read More
Many families do not want to believe their child is... Read More
How would you like to have a closer relationship with... Read More
Once your little boy/girl goes off to school, you may... Read More
Do you praise your child when he fulfils a basic... Read More
The following spelling games can be used by parents to... Read More
Parenting |