"Most overnight successes are just plain lucky. Just ask any failure."
"If the only tool you have is a hammer, all problems begin to look like nails."
Here's a sure-fire prescription for how to fail in the game of life:
Develop an attitude, personality and spirit that are critical, complaining, cynical and comparative.
Demonstrate these characteristics on a regular basis, and I can just about guarantee you failure in life.
How to Be Critical
You've heard it said that some people see the world through rose-colored glasses. The person who has mastered the fine art of criticism sees the world through glasses colored by something I'd rather not mention.
These folks seem to live to find fault in everything with which they come in contact. Because we live in an imperfect world, something or someone can always be criticized.
In order to be truly successful at criticizing, these people must never offer solutions for what they don't like. This is because these folks believe people and things will be motivated to change if they are just criticized enough. It's a full-time job.
Instead: There are times in life when we all need to give and receive criticism. The wisest people know that you can truly benefit from useful criticism.
Criticism is a tool that is used sparingly at best and needs to be coupled with some positive comments as well.
How to Be Complaining
A close cousin to criticism, complaining is a way of life for some. Others have raised it to an art form. Nothing is ever good enough, not even close. If the adults who usually do this were children, they'd be accused of whining.
Again, it's crucial to refrain from offering any suggestions as to what could be improved upon, much less what is appreciated. These folks would complain in heaven, if they ever got there.
Instead: Define the problem, state how it affects you and then offer suggestions for what you would like to be different.
How to Be Cynical
We live in an age where cynicism is thought to be sophisticated. At the same time, remember when smoking was thought to be sophisticated?
In order to be truly cynical, you have to be totally convinced that the world, the people in it, and even yourself are only out for themselves and can never be trusted. Cynicism in its purest form totally rules out the possibility of hope, solutions and joy in life. David Letterman without the humor.
Instead: In no way am I suggesting that we should all approach the world like naive children. Any negative taken to the opposite extreme is still a negative. Instead, keeping a healthy skepticism about you protects you and allows for the possibility of hope, solutions and true passion in life.
How to Be Comparitive
Anyone who has ever been compared to a sibling, teammate or co-worker knows just how fun it is to be around this kind of person. "If only you were more like ... "
Other good comparative things to say are: "This time is not as fun as last time," and "the way you do it here is not nearly as good as we did it back there."
Remember to say these and all comparative statements with a certain air of superiority, nose slightly turned upward for full effect.
Instead: Start with what is working or is good about the situation, and then ask the powerful and rarely asked question:
"How could we make this even better?"
Visit secretsofgreatrelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.
post construction cleaning Deerfield ..Living without limits. Living your life to the fullest. Living... Read More
"Thinking is responsible for man's primacy on earth today. Existence... Read More
You wake up in the morning sleepy and fatigued; the... Read More
A more positive future, a happier life, a body that's... Read More
I will never forget an evening in 2003, when I... Read More
I believe that one of the best ways to stay... Read More
"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is... Read More
For the twelve hundred hostages, most especially Timur Kasumova.It's a... Read More
I started life writing in the fifth grade. My mother... Read More
At some point in our careers, we may find ourselves... Read More
Wahms, do you constantly compare yourself with others and come... Read More
The way to define your personality is to refine your... Read More
"The other night I ate at a real family restaurant.... Read More
When you change your thoughts, you change your life. The... Read More
It took me a long time to realise the benefits... Read More
You've heard the buzzwords: Attitude is everything! Change your perspective!... Read More
When someone thinks of a person with self-esteem most people... Read More
Recently, I coached a young woman whom I'll call Mary... Read More
I've had several coaching clients come to me who, while... Read More
The fear of success is more common than some might... Read More
It really doesn't matter what your objectives are in this... Read More
They're out there? they look like people you know, but... Read More
Drinking damages the soul; being lustful damages the vitality; greed... Read More
Do you know the problem with affirmations? You know, the... Read More
Ever had the sense that there is more to life... Read More
Airbnb cleaning service Bannockburn ..Did you know that our thoughts may be influencing our... Read More
(The following is an actual email conversation between Newton Hightower,... Read More
It started out as a windy, rainy day. A tropical... Read More
There is a growing volume of research that shows' staying... Read More
Who are the Whiners? Whiners are the people who always... Read More
Inevitably in life we will face disappointment from time to... Read More
I am often astounded at what and why people believe... Read More
Lately, there has been a collective challenge to avoid being... Read More
Many people would say that it is absolute madness to... Read More
"It really works!" "Well, I'll be?!"BJ like so many others... Read More
Bernard always had a problem with money.He was always lacking... Read More
Quote of the week:"Of all the attitudes we can acquire,... Read More
John Ryder awakens feeling rested, refreshed, and sensing a calm... Read More
Unhappy moods can be like comfortable sweaters, those old ones:... Read More
When you change your thoughts, you change your life. The... Read More
In 1978, Erma Bombeck wrote a book entitled "The Grass... Read More
Empty, Hollow, Nothing?.those words shout the sound of disappointment and... Read More
As we enter this holiday season, and this time of... Read More
When I was a young girl, my sister and I... Read More
You don't need to a piece of paper to prove... Read More
So what is a limiting belief?Don't you love the current... Read More
All the problems that any individual has in their lives... Read More
At first glance, it would seem that positive thinking and... Read More
Celebrating is a skill that adults with ADD (Attention Deficit... Read More
"If you don't enjoy getting up and working and finishing... Read More
Positive Attitude Tips |