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If at First They Dont Succeed - What a Great Opportunity!

When kids try new things, sometimes it's a 'fit' and sometimes a struggle.

So what's a parent to do when they find that a child is floundering in a new activity? What if your son is in over his head? Or your daughter is not doing as well as either of you had hoped? What if they even fail outright?

Often, they're tempted to give up. Just to quit. And with the busy schedule facing most families, supporting that decision can be a real temptation.

But what's the lesson from that? Quitting just makes it easier to quit again later, or, worse still, can stifle the urge to tackle future challenges.

When faced with failure at a new activity, another option is to help your child to take a lesson from the experience. Before they leave a troublesome or difficult activity behind, is there something that they can learn that will help them to do better the next time?

The topic of 'my child's failures' is a tough one for some parents to look at. But here's a hint: try hard to keep them just that-your kids' failures.

If you're concerned that their performance reflects on you, you're right. It does. But the 'performance' that most adults care about is the one that has to do with your child's values and character. The child who picks herself up, dusts herself off and gets back into the game, shows a level of resiliency and confidence that is a credit to both of you.

No teacher, coach or fellow parent ever looked down on a parent whose child gave 100% effort. If your child isn't talented in sports, but tries and gives his and demonstrated good sportsmanship, you'll be regarded as a good parent.

Andrea Patten, LADC is the co-author of What Kids Need to Succeed: Four Foundations of Adult Achievement now available on Amazon.com

For more information about the Four Foundations, or to book Andrea to speak to your group, please visit http://www.whatkidsneedtosucceed.com

In The News:

Longtime wildlife biologist Jim Ozier unties and then boards a small boat on Lake Jackson, an hour south of Atlanta.
The remains of two Civil War soldiers have been discovered in a surgeon’s burial pit at Manassas National Battlefield Park in Virginia.
The famous ancient site at Stonehenge may have been built using Greek philosopher Pythagoras’ famous theorem two millennia before the mathematical equation was developed, experts say.
If you live in the Northern Hemisphere, rejoice! The summer season officially kicks off on Thursday, thanks to the summer solstice.
The University of California, Riverside, explained Monday in a news release that the moniker “honors President Barack Obama’s passion for science.”
When one of the ocean's top predators washes up dead on a beach, it's likely that something fishy must have happened. On Sunday (June 17), beachgoers found a juvenile male great white shark (Carcharodon carcharias), weighing 500 pounds (225 kilograms), and reaching 8 feet (2.4 meter) long on Beer Can Beach in Aptos, California, near Santa Cruz, reported KION.
If a giant wave of plastic garbage washing up our shores seems like the stuff of science fiction, think again.
T. rex may have been a highly successful predator, but it would have been terrible at licking stamps, lollipops or popsicles, thanks to a tongue that was likely fixed to the bottom of its mouth.
A small space rock crashed into Mars recently, and NASA has captured an amazing view of its crater grave site, as well as the trail from an avalanche triggered by the impact.
New research suggests that a newly-discovered 'structure' in the San Andreas fault line could result in a massive earthquake, often referred to as the "big one."

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