"Most overnight successes are just plain lucky. Just ask any failure."
"If the only tool you have is a hammer, all problems begin to look like nails."
Here's a sure-fire prescription for how to fail in the game of life:
Develop an attitude, personality and spirit that are critical, complaining, cynical and comparative.
Demonstrate these characteristics on a regular basis, and I can just about guarantee you failure in life.
How to Be Critical
You've heard it said that some people see the world through rose-colored glasses. The person who has mastered the fine art of criticism sees the world through glasses colored by something I'd rather not mention.
These folks seem to live to find fault in everything with which they come in contact. Because we live in an imperfect world, something or someone can always be criticized.
In order to be truly successful at criticizing, these people must never offer solutions for what they don't like. This is because these folks believe people and things will be motivated to change if they are just criticized enough. It's a full-time job.
Instead: There are times in life when we all need to give and receive criticism. The wisest people know that you can truly benefit from useful criticism.
Criticism is a tool that is used sparingly at best and needs to be coupled with some positive comments as well.
How to Be Complaining
A close cousin to criticism, complaining is a way of life for some. Others have raised it to an art form. Nothing is ever good enough, not even close. If the adults who usually do this were children, they'd be accused of whining.
Again, it's crucial to refrain from offering any suggestions as to what could be improved upon, much less what is appreciated. These folks would complain in heaven, if they ever got there.
Instead: Define the problem, state how it affects you and then offer suggestions for what you would like to be different.
How to Be Cynical
We live in an age where cynicism is thought to be sophisticated. At the same time, remember when smoking was thought to be sophisticated?
In order to be truly cynical, you have to be totally convinced that the world, the people in it, and even yourself are only out for themselves and can never be trusted. Cynicism in its purest form totally rules out the possibility of hope, solutions and joy in life. David Letterman without the humor.
Instead: In no way am I suggesting that we should all approach the world like naive children. Any negative taken to the opposite extreme is still a negative. Instead, keeping a healthy skepticism about you protects you and allows for the possibility of hope, solutions and true passion in life.
How to Be Comparitive
Anyone who has ever been compared to a sibling, teammate or co-worker knows just how fun it is to be around this kind of person. "If only you were more like ... "
Other good comparative things to say are: "This time is not as fun as last time," and "the way you do it here is not nearly as good as we did it back there."
Remember to say these and all comparative statements with a certain air of superiority, nose slightly turned upward for full effect.
Instead: Start with what is working or is good about the situation, and then ask the powerful and rarely asked question:
"How could we make this even better?"
Visit secretsofgreatrelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.
green cleaning service Park Ridge ..Do you feel that your negative thoughts are holding you... Read More
Not Amen, just so we're clear on that.AND.The little connector... Read More
Using an opponent's force against them is the fundamental teaching... Read More
"Adventure isn't hanging on a rope off the side... Read More
The easiest, most exciting adventure in consciousness follows the lamplit... Read More
"Work on your career and you'll make a living. Work... Read More
You wake up in the morning sleepy and fatigued; the... Read More
Philippians 4:6-do not be anxious about anything, but in everything,... Read More
Turn brutality into kindness. There is no small deed and... Read More
There was some sunshine this weekend while I was writing... Read More
Kasia is a talented landscape designer who speaks several languages,... Read More
What is an affirmation? One possible definition is a specific... Read More
"There is an infinitely worthier subject for philosophers (to study)... Read More
1. Take passionate action towards living your life by design.... Read More
Every emotion, wether we classify it as good or bad,... Read More
I once heard the story of a grown bear that... Read More
In speaking of comparison we need to be aware that... Read More
A rager, or rageaholic, is a person who is addicted... Read More
The most dangerous thing is illusion. ~ Ralph Waldo EmersonFailure... Read More
At first glance, it would seem that positive thinking and... Read More
Emotions have the tendency to take over our actions and... Read More
That strange, gut-wrenching feeling you have is not the sushi... Read More
For some reason, most people find it easier to think... Read More
Does that title make you cringe? It made me cringe... Read More
The universe is vast, it's dimensions inconceivable, it's potentialities unimaginable,... Read More
cleaning help near Bannockburn .."The other night I ate at a real family restaurant.... Read More
The quality of your life is directly related to your... Read More
Ten tips to transform your move into a creative life... Read More
The late Norman Vincent Peale was a controversial preacher who... Read More
The world is going downhill faster than an Olympic skier.... Read More
Ever had one of those mothers, or grandmothers, who would... Read More
Why do we have such a downer on Pollyanna? After... Read More
For most of us our lives are a problem which... Read More
Yuk!One thing, I really have a problem with is criticism.... Read More
As I swooshed down the Zoom Flume water slide at... Read More
"We can change our circumstances by a mere change of... Read More
Every day something changes at work: your products, your customers,... Read More
Ever had a problem with doubts? Ever felt that nagging... Read More
Positive thinking in this day and age is a tool... Read More
"Most overnight successes are just plain lucky. Just ask any... Read More
"You can't always get what you want . . ."... Read More
Quote of the week:"Of all the attitudes we can acquire,... Read More
Human nature is created so that you can choose your... Read More
Lately, there has been a collective challenge to avoid being... Read More
A confidence crisis is looming with a recent study showing... Read More
Know thyself.These words were inscribed in the vestibule of the... Read More
We are all involved in this game called life and... Read More
In my work as a professional coach, I've had the... Read More
Hospital patient undergoing surgery recounts how Hero Soul provided strength,... Read More
Once we understand the difference our attitude makes in our... Read More
Positive Attitude Tips |