MYTH: All teens have to rebel, and the teen years will be miserable years for a family.
REALITY: Teens do have to separate from their parents and families. That's good - otherwise kids would be living at home when they are 35.
They do, however, have to earn the privilege of being in charge.
MYTH: Once teens rebel, you have lost them forever.
REALITY: This is the fear of every parent, but it doesn't happen in most cases. As the proverb says, "Raise up a child in the way they should go, and when they are old they will not depart from it."
Two very important factors are implied here:
1) At some point, it is likely they could "depart" from what you have taught, and
2) they will come back to it.
This notion is elaborated on in Miller Newton's book "Adolescence: Surviving the Perilous Journey." Miller calls this notion Withdrawal - Isolation - Re-emergence. His view is that all adolescents withdraw, and some will go so far as to isolate themselves. They will, however, re-emerge at some point. Part of the parents' job then is to maintain the connection so a relationship can exist when they re-emerge.
MYTH: Raising teens is easy if you do it right.
REALITY: If you listen to some so-called parenting experts, raising kids - even teens - is a walk in the park.
According to them, the only reason you are having difficulty is because you are doing it wrong (not like them, in other words).
The reality is that parenting is a labor-intensive task. In order to raise kids and teach moral character, you have to go against the prevailing culture.
MYTH: Your teen years were just like those of your teen-ager.
REALITY: Many of the character issues they are dealing with are very much like the ones you faced. But the world, atmosphere and culture in which they are dealing with these issues is incredibly different. Don't make the mistake of thinking it's all the same.
Leading parenting expert Jeff Herring is a teen and family therapist, parenting coach, speaker and syndicated parenting and relationship columnist. Jeff invites you to visit parentingyourteenager.com for 100's of tips and tools for parenting through the teenage years. You can also subscribe to his free weekly internet newsletter "ParentingYourTeenager."
green cleaning service Park Ridge ..Life is funny.My twenty-year-old daughter, Melanie, has a her new... Read More
So, the thing is? I am feeling a little guilty.I... Read More
Why are more people, especially parents not outraged?I call it... Read More
In the news, we hear and see an increasing number... Read More
Oh Please, Don't Say Maybe!!!!Are you often a participant in... Read More
Are you a professional?Notice how the questions differs from, "Do... Read More
Many people still think that the game of chess is... Read More
Here is something that you might want to keep if... Read More
Who Can Register A Birth? The child's mother... Read More
Many research studies have shown the overall effectiveness of stimulant... Read More
There are many things to like about the television show... Read More
Unfortunately each year many young children drown in swimming pools,... Read More
Non-compliance is the family therapist's big word for your child... Read More
Are your children truthful, kind, and helpful? If so, read... Read More
Would you hand a child calculus problems once she was... Read More
"He is happiest, be he king or peasant, who finds... Read More
At the ADHD Information Library we are big believers that... Read More
The subject of competition is one that provokes some pretty... Read More
Do you feel like someone has abducted your sweet, innocent... Read More
Who lives in your house? Are they driving you "crazy?"... Read More
Very often, new parents rely on a parenting tip or... Read More
Learning responsibility is an ever widening and lifelong process.As thinking,... Read More
Raising a pre-teen or teenage daughter (or son) is not... Read More
Handing Down Malignancy.Children may begin bright and eager to face... Read More
Does the homework battle so typical with your hyperactive or... Read More
cleaning help near Bannockburn ..Creating and making special memories with your child is very... Read More
The great thing about children is they absorb knowledge like... Read More
"What age should my child start school?"This is a common... Read More
Let's face it.The job market is getting tougher every day.Computerization... Read More
Even if your teenagers do not use drugs, you still... Read More
Dear MomOn this day set aside to honour "Mother's" let... Read More
Every school year parents and students dutifully trudge through the... Read More
Oh yes you have! Suddenly, "Where's Bobby?" You instantly realize... Read More
Having worked with parents for the last 35 years and... Read More
School authorities continually claim that they want more parent cooperation... Read More
There is no doubt that mothers play an all-important leading... Read More
Last night Tom's daughter, Sue, came out of her room... Read More
Although many parents are concerned with our children's intelligence quotient... Read More
Dear Sir, It was with some interest that I read... Read More
'I felt great until I walked into the classroom -... Read More
Becoming a stepmother can undoubtedly be one of the most... Read More
Plus size children and overweight children need patterns and clothing... Read More
Jason Meridith's two-year old son whines when he wants more... Read More
Just two days ago, another 15-year old child was added... Read More
Children explore the world around them and learn through pretend... Read More
Maryann is so focused she's blind. She's slipped over the... Read More
In "The Ring Bear," a picture book by Tigard resident... Read More
Did you know that inconsistency on matters of discipline gives... Read More
Many parenting books advise against eating out with young children.... Read More
There may really be a real monster under your kid???s... Read More
Parenting |