Drug testing

Time To Give Up Resentment

Resentment isn't a spectacular emotion, but it is long-lasting and it easily becomes a way of life. When this happens, it blocks all possibility of successful and healthy relationships.

When people feel resentment, they draw back into defensiveness to avoid the possibility of still more hurt. Good performance, good relationships and good become impossible. It's also an entirely negative emotion. Nothing productive ever comes from it, while it easily progreses into more violent states like anger, hatred and cruelty.

The Rule of Resentment

People hurt by others often inflict identical hurt of their own in a vicious circle. The abused child becomes a child abuser. The despised failure seeks weaker people to despise. The bullied employee becomes a bullying manager. Resentment seems to cause us to repeat the behaviors we resented. We become still more sensitive to further sources of resentment. We find still harsher ways to hit back.

Resentment is endemic in many organizations, revealing itself in petty cruelties, pointless obstructions and childish acts of sabotage. When you enquire into the causes of the resentment, you mostly find multiple acts of unkindness and cruelty. Managers, browbeaten by their superiors in the all-out demand for ever higher profits, take to crushing their own subordinates with similarly impossible demands. Afraid of losing their jobs, people plot to put others in the firing line.

The "Golden Rule" exhorts us to treat others as we would like to be treated ourselves. The Rule of Resentment seems to be a direct perversion of it, causing us to treat others as badly we were treated -- or even worse.

The Rule of Reciprocal Behavior

Yet this rule of reciprocal behavior -- of doing to others what was done to us -- also holds good for positives. People treated kindly are more likely to be kind to others. People who are helped and encouraged become helpers in their turn. If bigotry and scorn breed ever greater negativity, tolerance, openness and honesty produce their own harvest of growth and mutual support. In place of the vicious cycle of carping and frustration, it's possible to set up a cycle of ever more positive behaviors.

When people consider ethical working behavior and ask "What's in it for me?" the Rule of Reciprocal Behavior gives a major part of the answer. Unethical behavior is a potent source of resentment and so will nearly always provoke an unethical response.

If you want to be treated ethically by others, you must start by being ethical yourself.

Adrian W. Savage writes for people who want help with the daily dilemmas they face at work. He has contributed more than 25 articles to leading British and American publications and has been featured in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, USA Today and The Chicago Tribune.

You can find his blog on ethics, diversity and living life to the full at http://www.adriansavage.com

In The News:

An invasive tick species, new to the U.S., has already popped up in nine states, and a new study suggests that the species could spread much further.
Archaeologists in Egypt uncovered the final resting place of a high priest that dates back more than four thousand years ago. 
2018 has been a busy year for space exploration. Here are some of the highlights.
A new kind of giant dinosaur has been described in Russia. Dubbed Volgatitan, the herbivore belonged to a family of long-necked dinosaurs called sauropods. It weighed 17 tons and walked the earth 200 million to 65 million years ago.
Just in time before you send your list to Santa, miners in the far reaches of Canada announced that they found a rough 552-carat yellow diamond, which is the largest diamond ever discovered in North America and the seventh-largest diamond ever found.
Images revealed during NASA's Juno mission have captivated the internet.
An extremely rare U.S. currency note from the late 19th century is expected to sell for up to $3 million when it is auctioned next year.
It's now beyond official: Greenhouse gases, such as carbon dioxide, pose a danger to public health and welfare, according to an exhaustive review that looked at 275 scientific studies published over the past nine years.
An Indiana officer got a stunning view of the Geminid meteor shower — known as one of the best meteor shows of the year — from his patrol car late Wednesday.
The shape of your brain may say a lot about the Neanderthal in you.

It Is All About Attitude!

Why do we really need the experiences that we have... Read More

Affirmations for Success + Music = Pow!

Music penetrates our mental barriers and influences the deepest areas... Read More

Big Move to a Small Town

I'm getting calls from folks who say, "I hear you... Read More

Mastering Mindfulness: A Thinkers Ode to Meditation

I'm lucky.When I was fifteen, I was the sole survivor... Read More

The Power Of AND

Not Amen, just so we're clear on that.AND.The little connector... Read More

The Difference Between the Curmudgeons and the Serene

Have you ever noticed how many unhappy people there are... Read More

Let Your Subconscious Be Your Guide... Oh Really? Not!

Do you ever feel sorry for yourself? Do you ever... Read More

Optimism: The Tremendous Benefits of a Positive Attitude

How many times have you heard someone say, "Hey, cheer... Read More

How I Make And Save Thousands Of Dollars Using Only My Subconscious Mind-You Can Do The Same!

Thousands of dollars will be yours, just by using your... Read More

Change Your Focus and Change Your Results

In his all-time bestselling record The Strangest Secret, author Earl... Read More

Community After Tragedy

One Friday in November, I began a journey from New... Read More

Doubting Your Way To Success!... Ridiculous... Oh?

Ever had a problem with doubts? Ever felt that nagging... Read More

The Ultimate In Positive Thinking?

I will never forget an evening in 2003, when I... Read More

Take a Gratitude Break

An old Joni Mitchell song reminds us, "don't it always... Read More

Positive Mental Attitude

Look at this glass on the table in front of... Read More

Mindfulness and Curiosity: Inspiring Affection

"I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious."... Read More

How To Gain Confidence Quickly And Effortlessly When You Feel the World is Against You

Have you ever felt the whole world was against you?... Read More

The Problem With Affirmations

Do you know the problem with affirmations? You know, the... Read More

What You Can Do As A Non-Raging Mate To Either Fix The Relationship Or Forget It

(The following is an actual email conversation between Newton Hightower,... Read More

Heal and Release the Past

I had a completely different idea for my main article... Read More

Be Selfish and Save The World

Why do we help others? There is a whole lot... Read More

Get Out of Your Way!

We hear a lot these days about accepting responsibility for... Read More

The Gift of Envy

The summer I was 20 years old, I worked as... Read More

Feelings and Attitudes

Are feelings and attitudes the same thing or different? Does... Read More

Start Your Day on Your Terms

Most of us start the day like we're trying to... Read More

led manufacturer led spot light bulbs Pete's produce ..