Drug testing

Time To Give Up Resentment

Resentment isn't a spectacular emotion, but it is long-lasting and it easily becomes a way of life. When this happens, it blocks all possibility of successful and healthy relationships.

When people feel resentment, they draw back into defensiveness to avoid the possibility of still more hurt. Good performance, good relationships and good become impossible. It's also an entirely negative emotion. Nothing productive ever comes from it, while it easily progreses into more violent states like anger, hatred and cruelty.

The Rule of Resentment

People hurt by others often inflict identical hurt of their own in a vicious circle. The abused child becomes a child abuser. The despised failure seeks weaker people to despise. The bullied employee becomes a bullying manager. Resentment seems to cause us to repeat the behaviors we resented. We become still more sensitive to further sources of resentment. We find still harsher ways to hit back.

Resentment is endemic in many organizations, revealing itself in petty cruelties, pointless obstructions and childish acts of sabotage. When you enquire into the causes of the resentment, you mostly find multiple acts of unkindness and cruelty. Managers, browbeaten by their superiors in the all-out demand for ever higher profits, take to crushing their own subordinates with similarly impossible demands. Afraid of losing their jobs, people plot to put others in the firing line.

The "Golden Rule" exhorts us to treat others as we would like to be treated ourselves. The Rule of Resentment seems to be a direct perversion of it, causing us to treat others as badly we were treated -- or even worse.

The Rule of Reciprocal Behavior

Yet this rule of reciprocal behavior -- of doing to others what was done to us -- also holds good for positives. People treated kindly are more likely to be kind to others. People who are helped and encouraged become helpers in their turn. If bigotry and scorn breed ever greater negativity, tolerance, openness and honesty produce their own harvest of growth and mutual support. In place of the vicious cycle of carping and frustration, it's possible to set up a cycle of ever more positive behaviors.

When people consider ethical working behavior and ask "What's in it for me?" the Rule of Reciprocal Behavior gives a major part of the answer. Unethical behavior is a potent source of resentment and so will nearly always provoke an unethical response.

If you want to be treated ethically by others, you must start by being ethical yourself.

Adrian W. Savage writes for people who want help with the daily dilemmas they face at work. He has contributed more than 25 articles to leading British and American publications and has been featured in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, USA Today and The Chicago Tribune.

You can find his blog on ethics, diversity and living life to the full at http://www.adriansavage.com

In The News:

A tiny chunk of stone that looks like nothing else ever seen in the solar system might be even weirder than scientists thought.
Scientists across the globe are carefully monitoring China’s discarded Tiangong-1 space station, which will plunge into Earth’s atmosphere at some point in the coming months.
The fossilized remains of a tiny duck-sized dinosaur with rainbow feathers have been discovered.
LEGAZPI, Philippines (AP) — Nearly 15,000 people have fled from villages around the Philippines' most active volcano as lava flowed down its crater Monday in a gentle eruption that scientists warned could turn explosive.
New image analysis by researchers at SETI indicate that there may be subterranean lava tubes in the polar region of the moon leading to massive underground glaciers, which could provide fuel for a long-term lunar base.
A SpaceX Dragon cargo ship left the International Space Station and returned to Earth Saturday (Jan.
Paleontoligists have discovered a new species of dinosaur in south-eastern Australia that was the size of a turkey.
While John Young, who died on Jan. 5 at age 87 , is famous for his Apollo 16 moonwalks and his role as commander of the first space shuttle mission, the NASA astronaut is also remembered for a small scandal he triggered with a sneaky act: smuggling a corned-beef sandwich into space.
Once upon a time, 165 million years ago, there lived a spider who looked like a pelican. About the size of a grain of rice and just as quiet, the pelican spider tiptoed under foliage in the leafy parts of the world, looking for prey to impale with the fanged, beak-like pincers at the end of its long neck. Its favorite meal: other spiders.
Sizable deposits of water ice lurk just beneath the surface in some regions of Mars, a new study reports.

Positive Thinking: Are You Truly Being Positive?

Positive thinking in this day and age is a tool... Read More

An Exercise To Open Your Mind To Your Possibilities

Everything exists twice. First, in your mind. Later, before you... Read More

Change Your Attitude from a Whiner to a Winner

Who are the Whiners? Whiners are the people who always... Read More

Perspective Is Everything

Ever witnessed an incident that needed to be reported to... Read More

Management of the Almighty Anger

Apart form the Emotions and the attitude, Anger is a... Read More

Peak Performance

Peak Performance. It means being at the top of your... Read More

Tips on Boosting Your Self-Confidence

How you feel about yourself truly does affect your interaction... Read More

Your Mental Attitude is The Key!

As a being of thought, your dominant mental attitude will... Read More

The Illusion of Failure

The most dangerous thing is illusion. ~ Ralph Waldo EmersonFailure... Read More

Train Your Brain, Or Cook Your Goose!

One day while in deep meditation and self analysis, a... Read More

Why You Want What You Cant Have

"You can't always get what you want . . ."... Read More

Are You Thinking The Right Thoughts?

"A person is limited only by the thoughts that he... Read More

Cleaned Up or Cleaned Out?

I need your help. I did a good deed recently,... Read More

Learning To Embrace Change

The only constant is change. If theres one thing we... Read More

Increasing Expectation Positively!

At your next staff meeting lead your team through the... Read More

Anamchara - Beyond Positive Thinking

One of the most well known books ever written on... Read More

Questions and Affirmations - The Art (and Science) Of Talking To Yourself

I Hear Voices?This is not a statement of paranormal; it... Read More

Important Days Ahead

Humans tend to categorize things by large or small, bright... Read More

3 Ways to Change Roadblocks into Valuable Tools

Our initial reaction when hitting a setback or a "roadblock,... Read More

Heal and Release the Past

I had a completely different idea for my main article... Read More

The Gift of Envy

The summer I was 20 years old, I worked as... Read More

Stream of Consciousness

One thing that is important to realize about thought: one... Read More

Start Your Day on Your Terms

Most of us start the day like we're trying to... Read More

Self-Confidence Sliding Downward!

There are times in all of our lives where our... Read More

Not Getting What You Want in Life? Your Thoughts Could Be the Culprit

Unhappy? Stressed out? Do you feel you not only want... Read More

street light camera induction wallpack Pete's produce ..