Drug testing

My Attitudes

"If you don't enjoy getting up and working and finishing your work and sitting down to a meal with family or friends, then the chances are you're not going to be happy. If someone bases his or her happiness or unhappiness on major events like a great new job, huge amounts of money, a flawlessly happy marriage or a trip to Paris, that person isn't going to be happy much of the time. If, on the other hand, happiness depends on a good breakfast, flowers in the yard, a drink or a nap, then we are more likely to live with quite a bit of happiness." ~~Andy Rooney

Andy Rooney says it well. Your happiness depends upon your attitude, just as my happiness depends upon my attitude. If my happiness depends upon things happening or people acting in a certain way, there's very little chance that I'll ever be happy. Too many things will stand in the way of my happiness, mostly things not happening and people not acting in certain ways. And once these things do happen or not, my reaction to them will determine whether or not I'm in a state of happiness.

This is nothing new. Many people for many years have been writing and speaking and teaching about the power of our attitudes to foster or inhibit happiness, and they all say basically the same thing: our attitude determines our happiness. Something that I've been learning more clearly in recent years, though, is just how strongly my attitude is related to my beliefs, and how much my beliefs can cause my attitudes.

I'm not talking about religious beliefs, although I see how they can be related. I'm talking about the beliefs that I have about myself, my friends, acquaintances, situations in which I find myself, and all the other aspects of my daily life. These beliefs keep me acting in certain ways and keep me seeing things in the same ways, over and over again.

I'll give you an example: a belief that has stuck with me since childhood is that nobody wants to be around me. This belief is a result of two major factors: growing up in a military environment and a parent's alcoholism.

Growing up in a military family, we moved constantly all throughout my childhood. We never stayed in one place long enough to make long-term friends, and whenever we moved to a new place, we were all of a sudden living among people who already had friends, and who usually had had them for a while. Because our family always chose to live off-base, we weren't even living around other military families with kids who were going through similar experiences; instead, we moved into neighborhoods that didn't deal with a lot of military families, and where people were pretty well established in their lives.

My father's alcoholism also had a strong effect on my beliefs--I never thought that anyone would like me or want to be around me once they found out about my father's problem. So I put up walls to protect myself from the inevitable rejection--I kept to myself because I was sure that nobody would be interested in being with me.

To this day, that belief is a part of me, always present to one degree or another -- sometimes stronger, sometimes weaker, but always there. My attitude towards other people is strongly affected by this belief that no one wants to be around me, because this belief gives people power over me. I always expect them to reject me eventually, so I can't get close to them. In fact, I often can't even meet people because I "know" that they have friends in their lives, other people with whom they spend time and do things, and the chances of them having time for me or being interested in doing things with me are very slim, indeed.

Those are my beliefs, though, and my attitudes towards these people are determined by those beliefs. The way I act when I'm with them reflects the hopelessness of ever becoming a friend with anyone. My attitude always seems to be that I'll become an acquaintance with no chance of ever becoming a friend, and people respond to my attitude by becoming acquaintances. The world gives back to me a reflection of my attitude.

Intellectually, I battle this tendency constantly. I know where it comes from, I know what it is, and I know how it manifests itself, but acting in a different way is extremely difficult.

On the other hand (and this is an important part), I don't allow this particular problem to make me miserable. My attitude towards the rest of life -- my work, my students, sunsets, books, this website -- isn't determined by this particularly difficult aspect of my life. I don't let my lack of close friends make me miserable, and I don't look at it as a reflection of who I am as a person, but more as a reflection of how I act. The joys and beauties of life do not depend on me having a large group of strong friends; rather, they're always there for me to enjoy and experience. My belief in this case is that the world is a beautiful, marvelous, miraculous place, and that belief gives me a grateful, loving attitude towards the world and makes it a wonderfully enjoyable place.

What kinds of beliefs are you carrying around with you? Beliefs of inadequacy, beliefs that people want to harm you, beliefs that nobody cares about you? Beliefs that you can't succeed in business or in relationships? How much are your beliefs controlling your attitudes? Remember always that the world is a mirror, and it gives back to us the attitude that we give to it. Until we're able to change our beliefs, it will be almost impossible to change our attitudes, and thus change our lives.

Tom Walsh is a student of life and living who has created http://www.livinglifefully.com, one of the web's most extensive collections of inspirational and motivational material.

In The News:

Memorial Day revelers who flock to the Jersey Shore are being advised to be wary of a real sting operation.
(Spoiler Alert!
SpaceX successfully launched a Falcon 9 rocket containing 60 satellites from Cape Canaveral in Florida Thursday evening.
A family in Bainbridge, Ga., had the “surprise of a lifetime” when they found a massive alligator soaking in some sun in their front yard.
Two huge male rat snakes were caught fighting over a female in North Carolina, in a rare video.
Scientists have discovered layers of ice buried a mile beneath Mars’ north pole that could help unlock the Red Planet’s history.
Two orphaned bear cubs have been rescued from a huge 70-foot spruce tree in Canada.
Male Egyptian fruit bats will allow female bats to take food straight from their mouths and scientists believe they know why -- the bats are trading food for sex.
In May 2018, a startling study revealed that there was an "unexpected and persistent increase" of chlorofluorocarbons (CFCs) in the atmosphere. At the time, scientists could not pinpoint the exact location of the ozone-depleting gas, but subsequent media reports suggested that the clues lead to a rural, industrial town in China. Now, a new study confirms that the rise in CFCs is indeed coming from northeastern China based on atmospheric observations.
A doughnut-loving bear is “staying out of trouble” after it traveled thousands of miles to return home, say wildlife officials.

Overcoming Bad Moods

From experience, one of the biggest stumbling blocks for people... Read More

Start Living Your Dreams Today With a Positive Attitude

"Those people who think they can do something and those... Read More

Discover The 8 Steps To A Mountain Moving Faith

" If you have faith as a grain of musterd... Read More

Changing Negatives to Positives

Occasionally people will ask me how I keep a positive... Read More

Clenching?

What are you holding onto? Wanta quit?There are many things... Read More

Enlarge Your Vision

Millions struggle through life barely earning enough to survive. Many... Read More

Thanks For The Rejection!

It sounds a little masochistic, but I actually appreciate being... Read More

Acceptance as a Path to Inner Peace

Inevitably in life we will face disappointment from time to... Read More

Heal and Release the Past

I had a completely different idea for my main article... Read More

Using Power Affirmations on ePosters

I believe that one of the best ways to stay... Read More

An Unquestionable, Positive Demeanor - How to Maintain it

Near the end of December 2004, I received an email... Read More

Think Positive: Using Affirmations to Create Health, Wealth and Beauty

You've heard the buzzwords: Attitude is everything! Change your perspective!... Read More

Taking Yourself Too Seriously? - Suggestions for Reclaiming Your Perspective

"We can change our circumstances by a mere change of... Read More

Dump Those Negative Tapes

Every time something doesn't go quite right (rather frequently for... Read More

What Do We Choose?

Life is an enigma...It starts without our knowledge, grows without... Read More

Positive Mental Attitude

1. Smile2. Laugh3. Greet people courteously4. Be enthusiastic5. Dream. Engage... Read More

Adding Meaning To Your Life

You got up today to go to work, to come... Read More

An Exercise To Open Your Mind To Your Possibilities

Everything exists twice. First, in your mind. Later, before you... Read More

Magic Mirror Exercise

Good morning I love you.This is a basic exercise, which... Read More

Condition or Definition?

In talking with a coaching client recently, she made a... Read More

White Sun: How to Cultivate Ones Body

Drinking damages the soul; being lustful damages the vitality; greed... Read More

10 Tips for Practicing Positive Thinking as a Tool for Managing ADD

At first glance, it would seem that positive thinking and... Read More

Anchoring Positivity With NLP

There was some sunshine this weekend while I was writing... Read More

Focus Your Attention

Lately, there has been a collective challenge to avoid being... Read More

How To Have An Excellent Personality

The way to define your personality is to refine your... Read More

induction light step-dimming fixture Pete's produce ..