I was playing tennis today with one of my tennis buddies. We play once a week and we usually chat about work, professional tennis players and local news.
Today he was very negative about the people of the area we live in. According to him they are all thieves and crooks.
Now this makes me really angry when I hear him talking like this since I have had very positive experiences with the people I have dealt with locally. I find the locals to be very friendly, helpful and considerate.
So we disagree on the facts. What can I do about his negative thinking? What can you do when dealing with negative people?
Three Ways To Deal With Negative People
1. Get specific
When someone is caught up in negative thinking they will often generalize their statements. It is a good idea to ask them questions to clarify what they mean.
For example if my friend says all dogs are aggressive I will ask him:
Small dogs or big dogs? All dogs or certain breeds? According to who? In what kind of situations?
By doing this you can shift the perspective of the negative person from a generalized over reaction to a highly specific opinion. This will ease some of the negativity and the intensity of their outburst.
2. Let Go
Let go of wanting to control the opinions of the people you deal with no matter how negative they are. By all means talk to the negative person and use your persuasion skills to help give them a more positive outlook.
However remember that each of us is entitled to be negative, wrong and inaccurate! Once you accept this you will not get so stressed about wanting to change people who are negative.
And ironically when you stop trying to change people they can almost sense that you accept them and so your words have more impact.
3. Choose to Be Positive
When people around us are negative sometimes the easiest thing to do is to join in. You do not have to. If you want to just go ahead.
Otherwise find ways to maintain a positive attitude. Look for the positives in the situation and point them out to people. Ask yourself how you can use this opportunity to become better.
And refuse to get dragged down by others into the murky waters of negativity no matter how bad it gets.
Being positive is a choice even when those around you have slipped into negativity.
About The Author
Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to Developing Communication Confidence. Apply now because it is available for a limited time only at: http://www.howtotalkwithconfidence.com/report.htm
Oswego taxi to Midway ..Do you ever find yourself thinking, "Life has taught me... Read More
A balanced life not only leaves you feeling more fulfilled;... Read More
Facing a change and want to make it work for... Read More
What are you holding onto? Wanta quit?There are many things... Read More
What do you do when things in your life don't... Read More
It sounds a little masochistic, but I actually appreciate being... Read More
Speaking comes to most people as naturally as breathing. On... Read More
I am often astounded at what and why people believe... Read More
Being the next Carmen Electra or Paris Hilton might or... Read More
Philosophy of Forgiveness:The most powerful tool that human beings possess... Read More
Have you ever thought about you have a lot to... Read More
Sometimes we are in a position to look into the... Read More
In the latest and final Star Wars saga, Anakin Skywalker... Read More
Several years, I was listening to a radio talk show... Read More
The only thing between you and your desire to be... Read More
One day while in deep meditation and self analysis, a... Read More
Many of us allow our fear to stop us in... Read More
Life can be downright scary - sometimes more than others.... Read More
"In life, if you give yourself a concession, you'd take... Read More
Living without limits. Living your life to the fullest. Living... Read More
Ten tips to transform your move into a creative life... Read More
Every day something changes at work: your products, your customers,... Read More
Everyone of us has the potential to successfully more through... Read More
There is an old joke about a man who is... Read More
We have often missed the mark because we believe we... Read More
shuttle from Midway Morris ..Music is very powerful. The kind of music you listen... Read More
Our thoughts define who we are. They can make us... Read More
Unhappy? Stressed out? Do you feel you not only want... Read More
The universe is vast, it's dimensions inconceivable, it's potentialities unimaginable,... Read More
The most happy and successful people on earth have a... Read More
The world is going downhill faster than an Olympic skier.... Read More
There are only two emotions we can experience; love or... Read More
Positive self-esteem is very important if not crucial to our... Read More
Early in my career a position became available which I... Read More
Ever had the sense that there is more to life... Read More
Do you ever find yourself thinking, "Life has taught me... Read More
Do you know the problem with affirmations? You know, the... Read More
Gail's StoryGail is a friend of mine and she was... Read More
Quote of the week:"Of all the attitudes we can acquire,... Read More
Philippians 4:6-do not be anxious about anything, but in everything,... Read More
With the probable exception of some basic instincts ? or... Read More
I just heard the story of a man who hired... Read More
Studies show that men and women profit most with having... Read More
Often, I've come across individuals who, while in conversation, will... Read More
One of the first things that I work on with... Read More
I'm sure most of you remember the children's book about... Read More
"At birth, a baby's brain contains 100 billion neurons, roughly... Read More
As a financial economist my motivation has long been to... Read More
Problems, disappointments and trouble; the three skunks that sometimes think... Read More
Striving to improve our self esteem is on everybody's mind.... Read More
Positive Attitude Tips |