Drug testing

Give Your Child the Gift of Self-Esteem

Much has been said about the "gifted child" but in truth every child is born with unlimited potential. As expressed so well by Orison Marden:

"Deep within man dwell those slumbering powers; powers that would astonish him, that he never dreamed of possessing; forces that would revolutionize his life if aroused and put into action."

This statement can be true for your child. Not just if he's a "gifted child" but any child. Indeed, perhaps we should consider a "gifted child" to be a child whose parents have gifted him with a high self-esteem.

Children with high self-esteem are happier and more successful. Low self-esteem is common in children who are performing badly at school, have behavioural problems and suffer from depression.

The Newborn

The "helpless" newborn baby actually comes into the world well equipped with the power to get what she wants. Not only do her cries bring her parents running to tend to her; she also uses her body and facial language to get what she wants. It's no coincidence that babies learn to smile while they are still very small - it is an essential tool in their armoury of communication. A baby with a disarming smile can frequently wrap mommy or daddy round her little finger!

At this early stage, it's important to respond to all your baby attempts at communication. Attend to her when she cries (this does not preclude training her gently into a stable routine), mirror her attempts at facial communication and reward the infant sounds she makes by praising her and talking back to her.

The "Can-Do" Toddler

Toddlers are into everything! They are learning so fast about the world around them and want to explore everything, touch everything and even try to eat many things.

It is such a crucial stage and one that is stifled by many parents. Yes, you need to control your child's behavior so that he doesn't hurt himself or damage valuable property. But you also need to give him opportunities to express this exploratory behavior without constant criticism and telling-offs.

Put valuables out of reach and supply your child with toys or household items that he can play with safely. Try to find time to get down on the floor and play with your toddler. Let him watch you and imitate you. He could play on the kitchen floor with some pots and wooden spoons while you are cooking.

Discipline

I want to emphasize up front that I believe discipline is very important, because I don't want you to think in any of what follows that I'm advocating spoiling your child. Some parents call this "allowing the child to enjoy the freedom of youth." These parents are entitled, of course, to raise their children however they wish.

But if you want your child to grow into a successful adult, you would do better by teaching her firmly what is and isn't acceptable in present day society. And, just as importantly, helping her to learn self-discipline and that you will support her in achieving anything she wants, as long as she does so ethically.

Discipline should be sensitive, thoughtful and appropriate. You should strive to never lose your temper but to discipline your child calmly and firmly. When is discipline appropriate? When your child's actions (or lack of them) may harm herself or others. When is discipline not appropriate? When it is purely for the parent's own selfish preferences.

Talk to Your Child

Positive talk with your child and generally within the household cannot be over-emphasized. Avoid criticism wherever possible; it is praise that produces good, successful behavior. Be sure to find at least one thing to praise in your child every day. Even better, give praise as often as possible.

Are you having problems finding good behaviors to praise? If so, give your child a task to do that you know he is capable of. Children love earning their parents' approval. Also remember to praise your child for trying, on those occasions that he is not successful.

Set a good example; talk about your goals and successes, and teach your child by example to accept compliments gracefully. Resist the temptation to put yourself down when you are complimented - instead, say a simple Thank You. That's an important sign of a healthy self-esteem.

The other side of the coin to talking is, of course, listening. It is very important to listen to your child. When there is something he is upset about, don't sweep it under the carpet by saying "Don't be silly!" Whatever it is might seem totally trivial to you but often all your child needs is for you to empathise. "I'm sorry you feel sad about that." He may then come up with a solution, or put the incident behind him without further help. Or, you can suggest a solution.

The Power of Desire

You can give your child the best possible schooling, teach all the important techniques of success, encourage goal setting and set a fantastic example. But that is not enough! All these good things have one vitally important pre-requisite. Before you can achieve anything, you must know what you really, really want.

A burning desire is the first, most important and essential step towards any major achievement. As a parent, you are in a unique position to influence another person's desires - your child's. By the time they reach their teens, you will have lost this influence to a significant degree, as young adults are swayed much more by their peers' opinions than their parents'.

So make the most of the early years by instilling positive, beneficial desires in your children. The desire to do well academically could shape your child's further education and career much more than her innate ability.

How can you instil desire? Telling stories is a great way. Children love stories! Be creative and tell stories where the hero or heroine has a burning desire for something, overcomes challenges and set backs, and achieves the desired outcome. Try telling stories where a child achieves academic success, which in turn results in something even more desirable. For instance, one story could tell of a child who has a burning desire to travel to the North Pole. She succeeds academically and thus wins an award, which makes her dream come true. Tailor the stories to your own child's life and experiences as much as you can.

The famous author Napoleon Hill used story-telling to instil in his almost-deaf son both a burning desire to hear, and a firm belief that his disability would actually bestow upon him a great advantage (although at the time even his father had no idea what that advantage could be). By the time this boy left college, he had against the odds acquired a hearing aid that enabled him to hear clearly for the first time in his life. More remarkably, he had justified his father's belief by securing a marketing position with the hearing aid manufacturer to bring the same benefit to millions of other deafened people.

"Gifted child"? Give your child the gift of self-esteem, and you will give him the gift of happiness.

About The Author

Cassie Simons is the author of "How to Help Your Child Succeed", a revolutionary approach to guilt-free parenting.

Positive Parenting, Gifted Child

Visit http://www.KidsGoals.com today for the secrets of raising successful children.

cassie@kidsgoals.com

In The News:

A unique 2,000-year-old stone inscription unearthed in Israel has thrilled archaeologists.
A fire and rescue squad in California said they’re trying to find the owner of a tortoise that was discovered by paramedics Thursday taking a slow-and-steady stroll in El Cajon.
One of the most prized possessions of Brazil's National Museum has been found amid debris after a massive fire on Sept. 2 sent the building up in flames.
A 12-pound meteorite that blasted from the moon was sold at a Boston auction for the out-of-this-world price of $612,500 on Friday.
California residents were stunned to watch a fireball of space junk shoot across the sky and fall onto a nearby ranch last week.
Golfers in St. Petersburg, Florida, were shocked when they saw a massive rattlesnake slithering across the course.
New Jersey workers were cleaning up the Pequannock River in Bloomingdale's Sloan Park to prepare for a flood mitigation project Thursday when they spotted a stone with an unusual marking.
An extremely rare menu from Titanic’s doomed maiden voyage to New York is up for auction in the U.K. this weekend.
An invasive insect species native to China, India, and Vietnam is posing a problem in at least two states in the northeastern and southeastern part of the country.

Parents Demand Dumbed-down Tests:An Unintended Bad Consequence of the No Child Left Behind Act

The No Child Left Behind Act of 2001 is making... Read More

Nothing Like a Mothers Love

Travel is a common theme in my life -- probably... Read More

Paediatric Osteopathy

All babies cry, but if yours cries a lot, isn't... Read More

New Mom...New Baby...New Debt?

Ah, there is nothing like being an expectant mom. Along... Read More

Baby Name Meanings

Speaking as a Michael (a Hebrew name, meaning "Who is... Read More

Banishing Bedtime Blues

"My son won't go to bed at night without a... Read More

How You Can Help Your Child To Be An Avid Reader

Reading is the most efficient and economical way to help... Read More

Featured Article on Parenting: The Power of Belonging

Search for Assurance: The Power of BelongingThe job hunt is... Read More

The Effects of Televised Sexual Content on Adolescents

According to a September 2004 study by the RAND Corporation,... Read More

10 Steps To Prepare You For Life With Children

It's hard to explain to the uninitiated the changes that... Read More

Summer Camp Care Packages

Every summer our daughter goes to summer camp. She looks... Read More

Parenting Your Teenager: The Teenager and the Gorilla

Q: A parent writes in to ask, "You write a... Read More

Illegal and Legal Drug Usage in the United States

How bad is the illegal drug problem here in the... Read More

Life Lessons in a Glass of Beer

It was blisteringly hot last Saturday. As I took that... Read More

Water! Water Everywhere!

What one word best sums up summer fun? Water. I... Read More

5 Tips For Talking To Your Children About What They See In The News

Mommy (Daddy), Why do those people want to hurt everyone?Last... Read More

The Graceful Art of Defrazzling - For Mothers

"I wipe my baby's chin with my college diploma and... Read More

Best Investment

Every week I write something about the stock market -... Read More

Healthy Eating For Children: Six Simple Rules

Rule #1 Make Every Bite Count!Everything your child eats should... Read More

Old-Fashioned Ways to Inspire Children

"Walk through any toy store and you will see walls... Read More

Road Trip! Make It Fun For Your Toddler

If you had to spend 4 or 5 hours in... Read More

More than Mom and Dad

Love, love, love. It makes the world go round. It... Read More

Children Need Roots and Wings

"Good parents give their children Roots and Wings." --Jonas SalkThe... Read More

The Different Types, or Styles, of ADHD

Research literature, recent books, and common sense, all point to... Read More

Are Public Schools Anti-Parent?

Some public schools try to turn children against their parents... Read More

high bay induction lighting architectural street lighting Pete's produce ..